


Forest | z.h

by trapdoor



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Blood and Gore, College student Niall, Dark Zayn, Horror, Kidnapped Niall, Mentioned Louis Tomlinson, Murder, Niall Horan - Freeform, Niall Horan/Zayn Malik - Freeform, Niall Horan/Zayn Malik-centric, Possessive Zayn Malik, Rape/Non-con Elements, Thriller, Zayn Malik - Freeform, forest, ziall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:15:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 25,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26279281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trapdoor/pseuds/trapdoor
Summary: "Am I the most dangerous animal you’ve encountered?"or the one where Niall is stranded on the side of a dark road next to a forest, and evil is lurking just beyond the trees.
Relationships: Ziall - Relationship
Comments: 8
Kudos: 32





	1. 1

_ For the first time since his capture, Zayn Malik, the man responsible for at least 10 murders, will speak at his court hearing about the gruesome crimes that were committed, and has also agreed to give investigators vital information about a certain high profiled case. More information to follow. _

__

The courtroom was eerily silent, except for the occasional sobs of the victim’s family who sat as far back into the room as possible, not wanting to acknowledge or see the murderer of their loved ones. Police officers stood at every entrance and exit, their faces were somber with pity for the families who cried helplessly. Besides the families and officers, the jury displaced a strong look of either hate or disgust whenever they looked toward the direction of the murderer. No pity or sympathy was ever shown towards him.

He sat quietly, his back was facing the families and he was displeased by that. He wanted to look them in the eyes and laugh at their losses, knowing that he was the one who took their loved one’s lives. This caused a smile to creep across his lips as he looked at the table in front of him in thought.

“You might not want to do that Mr. Malik” Harry, his attorney, said.

“And why the fuck not?” he countered. He hated being told what he could and could not do.

“Because they’re looking” Harry motioned conspicuously to the jury that sat opposite to him and crossed his arms.

“They already hate me so why not fuel the flame? And they probably hate you too. You’re my attorney and keeping me from the death penalty after all”

“Court appointed attorney, let us not forget” Harry replied, looking straight ahead at where the judge would sit in a couple of minutes.

Zayn didn’t have time to reply, as he was harshly stood up from his arm by an officer next to him.

“All rise, the superior court is now in session, the honorable James M. Koufax presiding”

A tall man that looked to be in his late 50’s entered the room. His graying hair was combed back neatly and his face was clean shaved, however it did not conceal his intimidating demeanor.

“Please be seated. Good Morning, This is the case of the county of west Yorkshire against Zayn J. Malik. The county of West Yorkshire has persecuted Mr. Malik on 8 accounts of premeditated murder in the 1 st degree, one account of premeditated kidnapping in the 1 st degree, and 1 account of aggravated rape. How do you plead?”

The room was silent as Zayn leaned forward into the microphone that was placed on the table in front of him. He looked at Harry warily and he nodded, a curl falling onto his forehead to which he quickly tucked away.

“Guilty, your honor”

“Very well, and it has come to my attention that you also have decided to provide important information in connection to the killings, correct?”

“Yeah but-” Harry took the microphone, cutting off Zayn to which he shot him a glare. 

“My client has decided to reveal this information in exchange for a plea bargain. He would like to receive life in prison without the possibility of parole as opposed to the death penalty, if applicable”

The judge pushed his glasses up to the bridge of his nose and cleared his throat before speaking.

“It is dependent on the information that your client provides and how reliable and accurate it is”

“I understand, thank you your honor”

Harry pushed the microphone back to Zayn and sighed. He pulled out a handkerchief from his suit pocket and wiped his perspiring forehead.

“Mr. Malik, please approach the witness stand” the judge said.

The same officer guided him to the stand by his arm; the jury immediately cowered back upon the close proximity. The orange jumpsuit fit his body snugly and also showcased his tattooed arms since the sleeves cut off above the elbow. His shackles clanged together as he walked, but didn’t mind it. He liked the attention he was receiving and the fear that was displaced on everyone’s eyes.

A man in a business suit approached Zayn and held a book up to him, he directed him to put his right hand up.

“Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help you God?”

“I do”

Upon sitting down, another attorney that sat opposite of Harry’s table stood up and buttoned his suit jacket. He then approached the witness stand and adjusted his glasses.

“Please commence” the judge said, averting his attention to Zayn and the attorney.

“Mr. Malik can you please tell me about your life as a child, as I believe it will benefit the case”

Harry stood up abruptly and furrowed his eyebrows, “objection your honor, he’s veering away from the main topic of discussion”

“I’ll allow it, but with further emphasis as to why”

The attorney nodded and pursed his lips.

“Yes, well it can give an insight as to the intentions for committing the crimes and will help find psychological help for Mr. Malik in prison… that is, if he avoids the death penalty”

The judge raised an eyebrow in thought and nodded curtly.

“Proceed”

Zayn licked his lips, his throat suddenly becoming dry. He hated talking about his past. He had only told one person about it, the full details, and now they’re dead. He also hated feeling vulnerable and knew his tough demeanor would be torn apart if he told the explicit details, but there was nothing to hold him back now.

“Growing up, my parents… abused my sister and I. My home life was the worst thing imaginable…” He trailed off, newfound memories began to flood his head. 

Zayn snapped back into the reality that was this trial and looked off into the crowd of people, clearing his throat.

“Is this why you burned your house down? With them inside?”

Zayn was taken aback by the question but didn’t bother lying anymore.

“Yes”

The man paced back and forth, his clean shoes lightly tapping the smooth tile on the floor.

“It is also known that investigators thought you were dead. They hadn’t recovered any body but believed that you had also died in the fire, and ultimately suspected that someone else had committed the arson” 

He said this to the crowd and then turned back to face Zayn.

“I ran away. Into the forest that was about an hour from where I lived. I walked there all alone and I found an abandoned type of house so i decided to stay there for a while”

“‘A while being?”

“Years. I-I can’t remember how long…” 

The attorney nodded and swept away his brown hair that obstructed his vision.

“I see. That brings me to my next question, when did you start your killings?”

Zayn looked towards Harry, who slowly shook his head while frowning.

“I don’t know. I just killed them, whoever came close to me to where i was staying. It’s harder to hunt during the winter so I would take their money, if they had any, and buy things I needed in town”

“Define ‘them’ how many people are you referring to?”

“Everyone who came close to where I was staying. I had said that already” Zayn huffed, beginning to lose his patience. 

“Very well. What about the most recent victim? We know for a fact that he didn’t come anywhere close to your living establishment”

Zayn stayed silent.  _ His _ face crept its way into Zayn’s mind. He wanted to forget about him, but knew that would be impossible. 

“It was Niall Horan, correct? He had been missing for months, and was last seen around town. A town in which the only way to cross over to the neighboring city, was to drive down a long stretch of road through a forest. The same forest where  _ you _ resided”

Zayn’s throat went dry. His eyes darted around the room at the many accusatory faces that stared back at him. He had no idea how to counter the question and glanced at harry who mouthed the word ‘five’

Zayn nodded slightly, remembering what they had rehearsed in case something like this happened. 

“I plead the 5 th ”

“Alright then, no further question on that matter. Please continue.” The judge said without looking up from the paper he held in his hand.

The attorney nodded and nervously scratched his nose.

“Alright well for the records, since you did not want to tell investigators, we need to know the motive as to why you did such horrible things to this person, more than your other victims. Such as having forced sexual intercourse, beating them beyond recognition and torturing them relentlessly ” the attorney swallowed deeply, already feeling sick to their stomach just by asking that question. Zayn smiled, liking the reaction he had on this lousy attorney. 

“He was weak. What else could I say?” Zayn grinned and sat back, feeling pleased with himself.

“But you  _ are _ aware that you agreed to comply with investigators in telling us all of the events that occurred?”

“Yes, I understand. I am a man of my word and I do promise to tell” 

“Very well, include full details of the events please”

“Well…I remember that it was snowing…”


	2. 2

… Snow covered the pavement of the street making it incredibly difficult to drive, and the snow storm increasing in strength with each passing minute did not help. The blonde turned on the windshield wipers in hopes that it would make the glass clearer, but it helped to no avail. He decided to pull over and wait out the storm. It took him a couple of minutes to find a safe patch of road and pulled alongside the forest that was next to the road. He turned the heater up and fetched his beanie and extra sweater from the back seat of his car. He quickly put them on, his frigid fingers shaking from the cold. He then took out his phone from his pocket and dialed the familiar number he always called when he needed to feel at ease.

“Hello?”

“Hey Louis, how are ya?”

“Niall! Good to hear you. I’m doing alright. I’m watching the news right now about the storm and it looks massive”

“Yeah I know, I’m trying to wait it out” Niall chuckled, he laughed at his misfortune but knew he would get to where he needed to be in a matter of time.

“Oh god Niall, does this mean you’ll get here later?”

“Yeah, maybe 3 days at most” he sighed

“Alright, you need to get going now, the storm is only going to get worse from here on out”

Niall nodded and knew Louis was right. They quickly said their goodbyes and hung up.

The blonde sighed, feeling rather sad that his conversation was cut short but knew it was for the best.

He put his car into gear and turned onto the road once again. He drove for about 10 minutes until he felt the car jerk forward and then come to a complete stop. He closed his eyes and groaned, not wanting to go out into the cold and check what had happened to his car. He bundled up and reluctantly opened the door. A blast of cool air hit his face making him wince at the sudden change from being inside his warm car. He stepped slowly on the ice covered ground and made his way to the back. Turning on his cellphone flashlight, he furrowed his eyebrows at what he saw. One of the chains that was attached to the tire of the car had snapped, tearing the tire completely. He looked around, the long stretch of road ahead of him was completely empty, not a single car in sight. The night was very dark and the only forms of light were the headlights from his own car. Niall panicked and made his way back inside, being sure to lock the doors. He called Louis again but received no answer. He racked his brain, trying to remember the number for a towing company but was snapped out of his thoughts when a dark figure came into contact with the headlights of his car. The figure resembled a man but his face was obstructed by the night. He stood there quietly and didn’t seem to mind the bitter cold or wind.

Niall hesitantly got out and stood behind his car door, using it as a shield.

“H-Hi, I um… my car stopped and um you w-wouldn’t know the way to the nearest gas station?”

His teeth chattered together from the cold and he instinctively hugged his arms around himself.

The man didn’t answer and only stood motionless in the middle of the road. 

Niall moved closer to get a better look at the man and noticed that he had put a great distance between himself and his car. He immediately regretted his decision in being so far away, when the man charged suddenly towards him. Startled by his sudden movement, Niall began to run back to his car, the snow soaking his jeans as droplets fell on them. He was inches away from his car, but felt his whole body drop to the floor and his head hit the ground harshly. He had slipped on a patch of ice on the ground. His head throbbed with pain as his vision became blurry. The cold suddenly didn’t seem so bad, he appreciated the way it helped soothe his head. He was face down on the road, his breathing suddenly became slow and shallow. With his blurry vision, he saw a pair of feet circle around him and felt a strong hand turn him around so that he was on his back.

His head lolled to the side as he began to regain consciousness. He felt the same strong hands cradle his head and stroke through his snow stained hair. He opened his eyes and saw the dark figure above him, holding a knife. Niall screamed and tried to get away from the man but he held onto him with a firm grip over his arm. The blonde began to cry, his tears mixing with the snow that fell. His breath hitched in his throat as he looked at the man with fear. He shakily breathed in deeply and gathered all of his strength and hit the man’s face. The dark figure was taken aback and let go of Niall, only to chase after him as soon as he gained his composure.

Niall ran with determination, trying to get away from him. His heart hammered in his chest from fear and from running so quickly. He was running blindly, he couldn’t see a thing ahead of him except for the falling snow. He felt that he had already left the man behind, until he heard loud footsteps quickly approaching him out of nowhere.

He was suddenly pushed to the ground and hit his head again, a searing pain shot through his forehead and he was sure he was bleeding. His suspicion was confirmed when he felt the warm substance trickle down over his eyebrow. The man grunted as he tried to grab both the blonde’s hands in one of his own. Niall sobbed and tried to fight his way out but the man was too strong. The man had enough of the boy’s screams and struck him harshly across the face.

The boy’s head jerked to the side, the blood that was dripping from his head had made its way down toward his cheek and smeared across, causing his pale skin to turn a shade of red. The boy had lost consciousness and his arms dangled loosely as the man hoisted him over his shoulder and carried him deep into the forest.

-

“What did you do then?” the attorney questioned.

Zayn kept his gaze fixed on his hands in his lap. He could feel everyone’s eyes on him.

“I took him back with me and made sure he didn’t leave”

The attorney nodded, unsure of how else to respond.

“Very well. It is also known that he had many bruises and physical signs of harm all over his body. When did these manifest themselves?”

Harry shook his head at the opposing attorney, a frown beginning to form on his lips. 

“Your honor, he’s essentially setting my client up for self incrimination if my client were to answer these unreasonable questions” 

The attorney pursed his lips and shot Harry daggers as the curly haired man smiled smugly, and intertwined his fingers together. 

The judge sided with Harry and allowed the attorney to continue with another question. 

“Alright. Based upon your statement you said that the victim, Mr. Horan, was there with you for about a month... before he was killed. Is this true?”

“Yes, I suppose” Zayn said blankly.

“Then please explain to everyone in this courtroom the events that occurred during the month…” the attorney cleared his throat once more before speaking, “be as… explicit and detailed as possible.”

Zayn grinned before adjusting himself so that he was closer to the microphone.


	3. 3

_ Night one _

“Stop screaming, or i’ll cut your fucking tongue out!” he yelled into the boy’s face, causing his loud screams to turn into small whimpers. 

The boys’ eyes darted across the room. It was a small enclosed space with a mattress only a few feet away from him. The floor beneath him was cold and he found himself having a hard time adjusting to the absence of light as he focused on the man that was quickly approaching him from the corner of the room. 

The man gripped the boy's jaw tightly within his gloved hand, trying to examine the boy in front of him but he kept squirming which caused the man to lose his patience, and slapped him hard across the face. The boy cried out in pain and turned away to look at anywhere but at the man in front of him. He began to touch the boys’ jeans slowly, patting his pockets to which the blonde stiffened. He felt something soft in the boys pocket and pulled out what seemed to be a wallet. Satisfied with his find, he turned around to observe what was inside. He opened it carefully and pulled out the boy’s identification. 

He scrutinized the card and saw the boy’s name.

“Niall Horan” the man said. The first time he had ever heard of such a name. It was both intriguing and perplexing. He knew that the boy must have to be foreign and smiled when he saw that Niall was only two years younger than him, but he had already known that. What surprised him even more was the lettering of words on the top of the card that read  _ ‘international student identification card’  _

He turned to Niall and crouched down so that he was eye level with him. The black ski mask that the man wore looked worn out and dirty. Speckles of unmelted snow were rapidly melting into the fabric. Niall tensed up seeing his golden brown eyes as they stared intently at him, and could also see some stubble showing through underneath the fabric of the ski mask. 

“What are you doing here in Bradford ?” his eyes burned into the soft blue ones that struggled to hold back tears.

“I-I go to uni here. I’m originally from Ireland but I’m a travel abroad student a-and I was going to go meet a friend in London”

Zayn stared coldly at the boy and smiled sinisterly. 

“You’re a long way from London. I don't believe you’ll get there in time… or you won’t get there at all”

Niall swallowed hard and gathered every bit of strength to look at his captor in the eyes.

“Please. I promise I won’t tell anyone about this, just please let me go” he pleaded. 

He lost the inner battle he had with himself and let his tears fall freely, showing just how vulnerable he was with his captor.

The man frowned and struck the boy harshly, the blonde yelped at the pain and closed his eyes ready for another blow, but it didn’t come.

Instead he felt the heavy chains fall from his wrists and opened his eyes cautiously. 

“You know what? Let’s play a game. _ It’s fun _ .”

He lifted the boy up from his arm and opened the heavy steel door with the other. He led them outside into a hallway and through another door, leading to a set of stairs. It was a maze of sorts to Niall who took mental notes of which doors they went through. Once they were outside in the bitter cold, he threw the blonde onto the ground and cleared his throat.

“Alright. You’re free to go”

Niall looked at the man wearily and cautiously stood up.

“But if I catch you, i’m going to keep you until I decide to kill you” 

He looked at Niall with cold eyes, but grinned seeing his lips tremble with fear.

“I’ll be nice for once in my life, so I’ll give you a 30 second head start.” he laughed ominously. 

Niall widened his eyes in horror at the realization that he was about to be hunted like some wild animal in the forest.

“No, please don’t do this. I don’t want this!” the boy pleaded once more.

The man only frowned and shook his head.

“You’re wasting time, Niall”

With that, the boy staggered off into the woods. He quickened his pace and ran fast, his eyes were blurred with tears, feeling hopeless as he looked at his surroundings.

_ N.H _

Everything was dark. I could faintly make out the figures of the trees as I ran past them. I prayed that there wouldn’t be any wild animals out at this time of night but my suspicions were confirmed when I heard the howls of what might be a wolf and its pack. I stopped to catch my breath; I rested my hands on my knees and winced when I felt my stomach contract in pain. My heart then began to beat even louder when I heard footsteps coming towards my way. I ran quickly, trying not to make any noise, and hid behind one of the dead trees.

When I made sure that I was alone again, I came out of my hiding spot and ran to where I believed there was a road. It was so dark I cautiously planted my feet in the snow to avoid falling over something but I knew I was wasting time by doing this. After a few more steps I could make out the faint outline of a cave. I sped towards it and dove inside. I didn’t care about the potential animals in here with me or spiders that I would have normally been terrified of. All that was going through my mind was trying not to get caught _.  _ The cave was small, only large enough for me to sit down in as it wasn't very deep but I crawled in as far as I could. I lost my breath when I saw a pale beam from a flashlight shine outside the cave. I shielded myself away from the opening of the cave and waited.

_ Nothing _

Nothing happened for what seemed like forever and I finally made the decision to peek outside. I slowly crawled out, my hands burning from how cold the snow was. I looked around, trying to see if the beam from the flashlight was visible but I saw nothing.

I then heard a crunch besides me.

I hastily made my way back to the cave, and surely enough, he was right behind me.

I dove in like I had the first time, but before I could get completely inside, he grabbed my legs with his gloved hands and tried to pull me out.

I held on to whatever I could, the sharp rocks I grasped cut my hands causing blood to begin to seep from my wound but I didn’t care. The adrenaline inside of me ignored the stinging pain on my palms.

I squirmed and tried to get away but he only pulled harder and I knew I had lost.

I landed on the ground face first into the snow. He then pulled me up by my hair and I screamed at the excruciating pain at my scalp. I scratched the ground, trying to get free, but was harshly turned over so I was now lying on my back. He held my arms above my head and hit me across the face. Hard. 

I only remembered the blurry image of his face as everything dispersed into a black abyss.

_ “You shouldn’t go alone on this trip Niall. I’m afraid of something happening to you while on the road” she said crossing her arms in worry. A frown was starting to form on her lips. _

_ “Mum, I haven’t seen Louis in months and he’s been on the road many times now and nothing’s happened to him. I’ll only be gone for two weeks. I promise ” I said reassuring her.  _

_ “He knows what he’s doing, Maura and you better call us everyday to let us know how you’re doing” my father chimed in from his seat in the living room. _

_ “Of course I will” I smiled at both my parents, excited for what was to come.  _

_ “Please be safe, I think I would die if something happened to you” _

_ “Yeah I know mum” I got up from my place on the sofa, across from her, and pulled her into a hug.  _

I woke up to darkness. I couldn’t really see if it was night or day due to the boarded up windows that captured every bit of light. I was in the same room as earlier but on the mattress. My ankles were chained to a large bolt on the floor, limiting my movement.I was terrified and didn’t know what to do anymore. I cried frantically as I tried to wriggle my way out but it was useless for me to waste my energy. The chains were too heavy and heavily secured around my ankles. 

I could hear footsteps fast approaching outside the room. I hugged my knees to my chest as I heard the door open and close. The floorboards creaked slightly underneath the man’s weight of his leather boots. I closed my eyes and flinched at the contact of a cold gloved hand caressing the side of my face. My heart raced rapidly as I turned away in disgust. My chest was heaving as tears began to roll down my face, my breathing was almost uncontrollable.

“You lost” he sneered “while you were sleeping, I went out and got supplies… since you'll be staying here for a while”

I kept quiet and my head low. I focused on the noises around me. The wind, as it blew and wisped around the trees outside and the sound of a plastic bag that he was rummaging through.

He lit a single match and brought it to a candle that was on a makeshift table. It was the only source of light that illuminated less than half of the room. 

I peered up slowly and saw him pull out a styrofoam container. It was instant soup. The particular instant soup that I always bought due to my small budget, since I was a college student with little to no money. He set it down and pulled out a glass bottle with hot water inside. The outside of the glass was dripping with water droplets as he poured the contents into the styrofoam soup bowl.

“I have to be honest, I expected more of a fight from you” 

He took off his gloves, and gently took the bowl in his hands. I took note of the many tattoos that were etched into skin and extended onto his wrists. 

“But sadly you gave me nothing” he sighed. 

I shifted my legs slightly, the chains around my ankles rattled and felt as if they were getting tighter by the second. I licked my chapped lips and spoke for the first time since he had caught me. 

“I don’t have any money if that’s why you're keeping me here… my parents don’t have any either, they--”

He stopped what he was doing to stare at me coldly, his eyes bore into mine with anger. 

“I don’t want your fucking money” he clenched his jaw and set the things back down onto the table. 

He slowly made his way to me, crouching down dangerously close that I wanted to scream. 

“i’m going to ruin you in so many ways you’ll be wishing you were  _ dead _ ” he spoke sinisterly, his eyes roaming over my face with a grin.

I whimpered at his words that were laced with venom and closed my eyes, tears streaming down my cheeks as I tried to contain my trembling lips. 

“You want to know what I did to the last person who cried like a bitch?”

I shook my head, I could feel my heart hammering in my throat at how terrified I was. He laughed and licked his lips, eager to continue. 

“I took my knife out, like this” I swallowed hard as I saw the blade of his large knife glisten, and slowly being brought up to my face. 

“You know what i did next?... I gave them a  _ real _ reason to cry” 

Without warning he grabbed my face and traced the tip of the knife down my cheeks, following the trail of my tears. I pulled on his wrists, urging him to stop but he only held on tighter. He began to press the knife harder until he drew blood from underneath my cheekbone, making me scream. 

“Don’t make me gouge out these pretty eyes of yours” he taunted. 

It took everything within me to stop myself from shedding anymore tears. He roughly let go of my face and went back to the small table, once again grabbing the bowl of soup. 

He took the same knife he cut me with and dipped it into the soup, twirling it around the strands of ramen and brought it to my lips. I grimaced at the blood that was still visible on the knife and how it was now on the ramen. 

“Scared of a little blood?” He smiled tauntingly. 

I gasped as he lifted his ski mask to reveal his lips and put the knife into his mouth, eating the contents without hesitation. 

He dipped the knife back into the bowl and brought it to my lips once again. I hesitated a bit but finally took it into my mouth after he said that this was my only chance to eat. 

Oddly enough, it was still the same soup; the only thing was the situation in which I was eating it, that changed. After several bites I got enough strength and confidence to say what had been on my mind this whole time. 

“Who are you?” I whispered cautiously 

My voice was hoarse and shaky, giving away how I was truly feeling. Scared.

He looked at me and back at his lap. His eyes shifted from me to the bowl of soup in his hands. 

He ignored me, suddenly getting up from his seat and turned to the desk behind him. He cleaned his knife and placed it back into his jacket pocket and proceeded to put everything else back inside the plastic bag.

I contemplated on whether or not to push further but my curiosity had gotten the best of me. 

“I-I have a right to know this, and why you kidnapped me” 

He finally turned around, pulling a chair in front of me and sat down slowly. His eyes never looked up at me once as he spoke 

“I know you better than you think… we might have met in town... or at your school, but being the oblivious person you are, you might not remember me” 

My eyes widened, a million thoughts ran through my mind as I tried to pinpoint the exact people I’ve talked to in town, at school or any other place but nothing came to mind. I didn't talk to anyone. I was alone most of the time and kept to myself. 

He must have seen the puzzling look on my face since he continued with his story. 

“Your school is a large place but somehow you found your way to me. You were in such a hurry and had your things in your arms, and of course you didn’t see where you were going and… you ran into me, dropping everything” 

My eyebrows furrowed as I finally came to the realization that I knew exactly who this man was. He had helped me gather my scattered things from the floor that day and noted how I should watch where I was going. He seemed angry and in a bad mood but when he looked up at me, his whole demeanor had shifted. He stared at me for longer than what I considered comfortable and grabbed my hand for a little too long when handing my things back to me, making me wary of him. I remember smiling awkwardly and hurriedly leaving, although I was still grateful for the help and quickly thanked him, I could not shake the bad feeling I had about him. Although he had told me, I couldn't remember his name. My mind was scattered all over the place trying to remember as much as I possibly could. All i knew was it started with a ‘Z’ but that wasn’t much help.

I gasped as I had finally remembered his name. 

" _ Zayn" _ I whispered, so low that he didn't hear me. 

Almost as if on cue, he slowly reached up to his neck and pulled off the ski mask, revealing the same man I was worried about on that fateful day. His hair had grown since the last time I saw him, now almost touching his shoulders. His stubble was more prominent now without the mask and I could tell that he hadn’t slept in days because of the dark circles underneath his eyes. 

“You intrigued me. I couldn’t get you off my mind, and when I saw who stepped out of the car at that road, I couldn’t believe it was you. It was almost as if the universe wanted us to…” 

He trailed off, finally looking up at me. A chill ran through my body as I locked eyes with him. I was both angry and confused as to how the encounter at my school led to this. 

“No, you’re lying. You planned this. You planned to take me and keep me here. All for what?!” I screamed at him. I was furious and scared at the same time, uncertain as to what would happen to me. 

“ I didn’t plan anything” he said through clenched teeth. 

He pushed back his chair in anger and got up, going back to the other side of the room to continue cleaning, putting things away in the plastic bag 

“Fuck you” I yelled. “You’re a fucking liar” 

He whipped around quickly in anger and took long strides towards me. He reached down and wrapped his fingers around my throat tightly. He was breathing hard, his eyes bore into mine with such intensity.

“The fate of your life is in my hands, don’t forget that I can end it as soon as  _ right now _ ” he seethed. 

The anger in his eyes diminished as the frown on his lips twitched into a menacing smile.

“You know what? You should see where you’re going to end up if you keep testing my patience”

He let me go harshly and took out a small key, opening a lock that kept the chains around my ankles. Once I was free, he took hold of my arm and dragged me through a dark corridor to another room. He opened the door and threw me inside, I stumbled before I finally fell on the cold floor. I looked up at him and saw him grin before closing and locking the door, leaving me in an unfamiliar room and in the dark once again.

The smell was absolutely horrid in the room, it smelled of rotting flesh and was so strong it caused my eyes to burn. I stumbled around the room, my hand covering my nose as much as I could to try and suppress the smell. I saw that the windows were boarded up, but a small sliver of moonlight crept through a crack, and it was then to my horror that I saw what was causing the smell. I cried out in fear as I saw the many bodies that were among me. There had to be at least ten bodies scattered along this room. I crept closer towards the sliver of light, my hands touching what I assumed to be decomposing limbs.

I pulled aimlessly at the board, trying to pry the wood from the window. I gave up after what seemed like forever and curled up into a ball as I pressed my sweater sleeve against my nose to suppress the smell. I stayed like this for what I can imagine to be an hour, until the door lock rattled and was opened. He stood at the door, a pale light shined behind him, making his face indistinguishable. I slowly rose from my spot and could now see with more clarity what I had been surrounded with. The bodies were in contorted positions any living human would be incapable of making. Their faces, rotting to the bone, along with everything else. I ran towards him and quite literally threw myself out of the room and into the hallway. I cried as I witnessed what this man was really capable of. I cried for the many people in that room that didn’t deserve to die and I cried because I knew I would soon join them and be a part of this deranged man’s collection. He picked me up and I struggled in his grip. I was terrified and felt disgusted having his hands on me. Hands that were responsible for so many deaths.

“They actually respected me and listened to me unlike you, and see where they ended up? ” he taunted me.

“You’ll be in tiny pieces scattered all over these woods once I'm done with you” 

I physically wanted to vomit.

I was beyond disgusted and petrified with fear that I began to have a panic attack. My breaths were rapid and short and I felt my lungs burn as I tried everything in me to get more oxygen into my system. Black spots started to cloud my vision and the last thing I remembered seeing were his lips form into a smile as he slowly lowered me to the ground.


	4. 4

Day 1

_ “Zayn, please don’t!” I screamed, his body was on top of mine holding me in place to prevent me from leaving.  _

_ “I’m going to have fun seeing the life drain from your eyes”  _

_ With a swift motion, he brought down the knife he was holding in his hands, and plunged it through my chest. _

_ I watched in horror as he dragged the knife down toward my stomach and pried open my chest, using his hands to dig out my heart.  _

_ He held my still beating heart in his hands, the blood dripped down his fingertips as he smiled and exposed his sharp white teeth. He lapped up the blood that pooled into his palms with his tongue and without any hesitation, took a large bite out of my beating heart.  _

  
  


I awoke in a cold sweat.

I shakily touched my chest, relieved that my very vivid nightmare was only a dream.

_ It was only a dream _

I got up quickly and took in my surroundings. I was in a dimly lit room, the only light source being a candle. The windows had wooden boards hammered into the frame making the outside world indistinguishable and made the room more frightening and cold. I wasn’t wearing the same clothes as yesterday; I was in a pair of fleece navy blue sweat pants and a dark grey long sleeve that was way too big on me. I checked to see if I was still wearing the same underwear and was relieved to see that I was. He hadn’t touched me for all I knew, but then again I didn’t even know what he was capable of. I carefully got out of the small bed I was on and made my way to the door, and to my surprise, it wasn’t locked.

I slowly opened the door and peered outside. I saw nothing but darkness.

I gathered the courage in me to step out onto what I assumed was a hallway and stopped in my tracks when I heard faint whispering in the distance.

“ _ He’s never going to leave me… I’ll make sure of that”  _

I then heard the sound of bottles rolling around on the floor, followed by a loud crash. 

“Fuck” he slurred. I realized he was drunk as I heard him move around in what I figured was an attempt to clean up the mess. 

I slowly felt my way around the hallway, the walls were cold and wet with what I could smell was mold. 

I made it to the end of the hall which held a door, the smoothness of the door was extremely different from the rest of the hallway. I slowly turned the knob and made my way inside, being extra careful not to make any noise. After closing the door behind me, I turned around to find a single candle lighting a part of the room. I took it in my hands and shone it towards the other side of the room to which I found stacks of papers piled on the floor. I kneeled down, observing the various pages of newspaper headings. They weren’t significant, just pieces of paper reporting what was going on around the city. 

_ Why would he have these? _

I kept shifting through them and furrowed my eyebrows at a piece of paper put off to the side. The familiar news headline caught my full attention. 

‘ **_Local University students awarded with prestigious Award_ ** **’**

And there on the front cover was a picture of me with a few other people that had also won the award. I was holding up the certificate with one hand and had my other arm around my classmate, both of us smiling with pride. 

Why would he keep these? What did he plan to do with them? 

Feeling unnerved, I moved to another stack and saw what looked like a makeshift folder stick out from underneath the pile of papers. I gently pulled it out from the stack and opened it, my curiosity getting the best of me. A mess of polaroid pictures fell onto the ground next to me, I slowly picked one up and examined it closely.

It was a picture of my captor as a child with a small girl perched up on his shoulder next to him. He looked so happy and if I had been shown this picture some time before being in this situation, I would have never even thought someone like him could turn into such evil. At the bottom of the photo there was also some scribbling as if a child had written it 

_ ‘Happy Birthday zayn! Love waliyha’  _

I dropped the picture back on the floor and reached out for another one. I spread the many pictures around. My heart stopped when I caught a glimpse of something familiar. I slowly moved the picture out from the rest of the pile and stared back in horror as I saw my own face stare back at me. 

I threw it back onto the floor in utter disgust and terror. My eyes began to weld up with tears as I sat there, picking up picture after picture, each one of me. 

There were pictures of me going about my day in town, and of me at school, but what chilled me the most were the countless number of pictures he had taken of me. I knew then that I had been right. He planned to take me, and there was no other logical explanation especially not his bullshit excuse of fate bringing us together. All of the pictures were dated, ranging from about the time he had met me months ago at my school and from just a couple of days ago. 

How did I not notice? Did he have some kind of twisted obsession with me? 

I began to think back to that horrible awful night. If I had never been on that road. If I had stayed in my car. I wouldn’t be here right now. Or would he have found another way to take me? Was this all just… chance? How stupid could I be. 

I balled my fists and cried into my hands. I was angry at myself and at how stupid I was. Why didn’t I see this coming? Who was he? Why me? tears fell onto the pictures that were next to me and on the ground. I was so deep into my thoughts that I was suddenly snapped out of my emotional breakdown by searing pain. My hair was pulled harshly and I was thrown back. My elbow made contact with the hard ground,and I was sure to have a nasty bruise.

“What are you doing in here?!” he yelled angrily. 

I could only look at him. My mind was detached from my body and couldn’t form a cohesive response. He bent down and took me by my arm, lifting me up. He then shoved me against the wall and wrapped his hand around my throat, holding me in place.

“You fucking waste of space. Why are you in here? Why?!” He yelled into my face, the smell of alcohol on his breath made me turn in disgust. He was fuming, his face was turning red and I saw the prominent veins on his neck. He squeezed my throat tighter, and I was sure that this time I was dead. I clawed at his hand desperately and gasped out the remaining breaths I had within me. My tears rolled down my cheeks, one after the other.

He finally let go of me and dragged me by my hair out of the room and into another one I hadn’t been in. He shoved me onto a mattress and took this time to lock the door behind him. The audible click from the lock sent shivers down my back. I looked at him and pleaded that he let me go and that I was sorry I went into the room, but he didn’t listen to me. 

“I didn’t want to do this now, but I need to teach you a lesson. One you won’t forget.” 

He slowly made his way toward me, his hands unbuckling the belt around his jeans. He pinned me down on the mattress and roughly turned me over so that I was now lying on my stomach. I began to squirm and fight to stand up but he grabbed my hair and held my head down. I was hysterical now, I knew where this was going as he pulled both my sweat pants and my underwear down and held my legs in place with his knees.

“Please don’t do this. Please… I’ll be good, I promise” I sobbed uncontrollably. My pleads were partially muffled by the mattress beneath me. 

He only laughed and leaned down close to me and whispered huskily in my ear.

“I’ll go easy. I still need you in one piece”

He grabbed a roll of duct tape that was on the side of the mattress and taped my hands behind my back.

“No, please. Please! You’re drunk, you don’t know what you’re doing!” I screamed out, trying to talk some sense into him. My face was hot from my tears and my heart was hammering unceasingly in my chest.

“Drunk or not, I was still going to fuck your pretty little ass” he slurred, his taunting laugh filled the room.

I heard him pull his jeans down and spit into his hand. He began to caress my back with his calloused fingertips and stopped for a second. My tears blurred my vision making it so that I could only feel what was going on. I felt his fingers enter me slowly and I squirmed at the uncomfortable feeling. 

“Oh god. You’re so tight and ready for my cock” 

I then screamed from the agonizing pain as he entered me roughly, his thrusts were sloppy and forceful; full of desperation. With every thrust, he moaned out in pleasure and clawed at my hips, pushing himself deeper inside of me. All I felt was agony from my lower half and the back of my neck, from where he was holding me down with one hand. After what seemed like an eternity, he released himself inside of me, followed by a moan as he pushed himself off. He took his time in cutting my hands free and then turned me over. 

I fought against him as he attempted to pull my pants back up to my waist and felt my entire skin crawl as I could feel him staring at me. I slowly trailed my eyes towards his direction and I saw a glimpse of sadness, which was quickly masked by a frown taking over his lips. Something that I thought I would never see from him.

His eyes glossed over with intoxication and he licked his lips as he tried to find words. 

“Are you alright?” He said, with genuine concern I thought it was sarcasm. 

I hugged my knees to my chest and winced in pain at my sudden movements. I buried my face in my lap and sobbed loudly as my mind wouldn’t stop recounting the violent event that had just happened seconds ago. 

“y-you…” 

I couldn’t form tangible words as I desperately tried to control my sobs. 

“I don’t understand why you’re so upset. You probably leap onto every man...or woman, considering you’re a college student” 

I raised my head from my lap and stared at the wall ahead of me, avoiding all eye contact with him

“I was a virgin” I whispered softly. The pain in my voice was nothing compared to the pain I was feeling in my heart. I felt completely violated and used. Stripped of everything I had. 

He was visibly distraught as I saw him shift in his seat. 

He combed through his hair with his fingers and sighed, pulling up his own jeans before making his way to the other side of the small room. He sat down on the ground, leaving me alone on the bed.

His entire demeanor changed at that moment. He wasn’t the scary monstrous devil he always was, but turned into an actual person with feelings. I could see the regret linger in his eyes as he sobered up. His shoulder length hair was messy and some strands stuck to the sweat on his forehead. His 5 o'clock shadow was more evident in the pale candle light along with the dark circles beneath his eyes.

He cleared his throat making me flinch at the sound. 

His eyes remained transfixed on the floor in front of him. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were…” he trailed off. 

“What difference would it have made if I wasn’t a virgin?” I cried “You still…” 

I couldn’t find the strength to say the words out loud. I hugged my legs closer to my chest, feeling absolutely disgusted with myself. 

“You did the same with the others. You probably did the same to the little girl in the picture. Didn’t you?” I said between sobs. 

He looked up at me and shook his head, pained that I accused him of such a thing. 

“That was my sister and I  _ loved _ my sister. My parents were sick fucks, they abused both of us. They were the ones who killed her, and as for those people, I never fucking touched them” 

“Then why me?!” I screamed at him.

I was confused and horrified at what this man was truly capable of.

He only stared at me. His gaze traveled from mine, to the floor. I hope he felt ashamed and regretful with himself for what he had done. 

“What makes me an exception” I said quietly, almost as if I were trying to answer that question myself. 

He looked up at me one last time, before breathing out almost in a defeated manner and quickly making his way out of the room, leaving me alone with my head flooded with endless thoughts.

\-------------

I had fallen asleep sometime after since I was awoken by the door shutting loudly behind me. I jumped up and froze as I saw him walking towards me with a tray. I backed away from him in the corner of the bed again. He set down the tray on the bed and I saw a small plate of soup with a piece of bread next to it. I was starving and waited until he left to eat. I placed the tray onto the floor and laid down on the bed. I cried again at what happened today. I felt defeated and stupid for not fighting him harder and just letting him take whatever he wanted from me. I cried at the horrifying reality that I would be here for a while until the police or anyone found me and I hope it’s not too late when they do.

Day 7

I have been here for exactly a week. They have been nothing but a living hell for me and I feel as though I could die at any moment. On the 3rd night he had gotten angry with me over something I couldn't remember. I had never seen him this angry before, but i now know to what extent his anger could reach. He beat me so badly, I thought I was surely going to die. My left eye was swollen shut and I was bleeding severely through my nose and mouth. A long gash ran from the top of my temple to the bottom of my cheek bone, from where he repeatedly hit me to no end. He had kicked me on the side of my head, immediately causing me to black out and when I awoke, I had an awfully painful bruise on the side of my head . The angry hues of purple and blue took over my skin from his closed fists colliding with my body. Still, fresh lacerations broke my skin making some of them bloody, brown and scabbed.

From that moment on I stopped talking. Stopped giving one-word responses and stopped saying anything. This annoyed him but he let me be, surprisingly.

I was awake at what I assumed was late afternoon since I could see through a little sliver in the boarded up window, the sun beginning to set. I had slept through the day again. Not that I even cared. I wasn’t hungry anymore either and I only drank the cup of water that was brought with my food each day. To pass the time I would scribble on the wall furthest away from the door so he couldn’t see. I had found a pencil, the tip was dull and nearly gone, but it kept me sane for the time being.

On this particular afternoon I was scribbling song chords onto the wall. I would close my eyes and imagine how each one would sound like put together as a song and it made me sad that I didn’t have my guitar with me. 

I heard footsteps sounding down the hallway of the room and quickly hid my pencil behind a wooden board that kept me from the window. I quickly laid down on the bed, my back towards the door. It suddenly swung open and then I felt the bed dip down next to me.

He cleared his throat and I heard a piece of paper being unrumpled.

“I went into town today and saw this”

I didn’t turn around to look. I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of successfully getting my attention.

After a while, he sighed and left quietly as if he hadn’t said anything. I was genuinely surprised that he didn’t yank me out of the bed by my hair and beat me for not paying attention to him. 

I turned around, ready to retrieve my pencil from my hiding spot, when I saw a crumpled paper on the window sill. I got up quickly and carefully took the crumpled paper in my fingers. The few rays of sunshine that pierced through the boarded up wood, helped me make out what was on the paper. I slowly opened it, being careful since the corners looked ripped and ragged.

I gasped and covered my mouth with my hand as I sobbed.

My hand was shaking as I held the paper with my own smiling face staring back at me.

It was a picture of me in my graduation cap and gown from secondary school 

My smile was bright and happy. I remember getting my braces off a day prior to this photo being taken and was ecstatic to show the world my now straight teeth instead of the crooked ones I was so embarrassed about. On the bottom of the paper was all of my information; my name, age, how tall I was, my eye and hair color followed by the date of when I was last seen. There was also a note written

“ _ Help us bring him home safe. His family is waiting for him. If you have any information on his whereabouts please contact the local police. Don’t forget to spread the message.” _

I was smiling and crying all at the same time. My salty tears stung the small cuts I had on my face but the little bit of hope I had of getting out of here made up for the pain. I was going to be rescued soon and my family didn’t forget about me like I thought they did.

They were searching for me.

I was on the floor, a million thoughts racing through my mind that I didn’t even notice the door open quietly and Zayn walk in.

I saw him through my peripheral vision, and the usual feeling of fear that would have taken over my body was overcome with confidence. 

I got up from the floor and held the paper to his face. 

“They’re looking for me and when they find me, you’ll spend the rest of your life rotting in prison” I spat at him. This new found confidence was diminished when he grabbed my arm and brought me close to him. I struggled against him but he only held me harder.

“Yeah they’ll find you, but not alive nor in one piece” he said venomously, his golden eyes were dark and void of any soul.

My eyes glossed over with tears as I processed his words.

“w-what are you going to do to me” I said in a whisper, that was barely audible to the both of us

He leaned in closer to my face, taunting me. A smile began to form on his lips.

“I’m going to have so much  _ fun _ with you, that you’ll be begging me to kill you ” he whispered venomously. 

I was fully crying. The familiar feeling of hopelessness and dread began to creep up inside of me. He let go of me and in the moment he turned to walk out of the door, a loud gunshot was heard outside. 

He turned back around, his eyes were wide with concern and in a split second he lunged towards me while I began to scream.

“Help me! Please! Hel- “ I was tackled to the floor, his body on top of me as he struggled to cover my mouth with his hand. I kept screaming loudly and fighting against him. I punched his chest with all of my strength and kept hitting him with the little energy I had left. He managed to pin both of my wrists in one hand above my head and covered my mouth with the other.

He was seething with anger, his face was red and I could see he was sweating from our altercation. He was breathing hard, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

We stayed this way for what seemed like minutes until there was a hard knock at the metal door below.

His anger seemed to leave his body immediately, only to be replaced by fear.

He quickly let go of me and I didn’t have a chance to scream as I was struck across the face with such force I thought my cheek bone was sure to be broken.

My head lolled to the side. I was going in and out of consciousness and I could barely make out his silhouette as it darted quickly across the room. I felt my hands being brought together in front of me and faintly heard the sound of duct tape being ripped and placed around my wrists, binding them together. I felt another piece of tape put on my lips and being wrapped around my head, making it tighter. Black splotches were surrounding my vision as I fought to stay awake, but I was feeling more and more tired as the seconds passed.

I faintly heard him yell “coming!” as I fully succumbed to the darkness.


	5. 5

_ 3 rd P O V _

The darker haired man picked up the unconscious boy in his arms and laid him down on the bed next to him. He hastily closed the door behind him, locking it and composing himself. He wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand and ran his fingers through his hair, in hopes that it would make him look less disheveled. He sprinted down the rusty metal stairs and slowly made his way to the heavy metal doors. He clutched a large knife behind his back as he opened the door to reveal who was on the other side.

A small man, no older than sixty stood several inches away from the door. He was bundled up well for the cold winter season, his shoulder held a hunters bag complete with a rifle and other materials used to hunt wild game in the forest.

“Oh, hello there, I didn’t know if anyone was even here considering how run down this place is. You don’t live here do you?” the man asked curiously.

“I uh… no I don’t actually. I just like coming down here to hunt “

The man nodded, eyeing Zayn wearily

“You’re not hurt right? I could have sworn I heard someone screaming while I was hunting in the area”

Zayn was visibly taken aback. He quickly regained his composure and shook his head, forcing out a laugh.

“No I’m fine, It must have been some animal in the forest. I’m very grateful for your concern sir, but I need to get back to gathering my things. I plan on heading home soon” 

The man looked past Zayn and behind him, seeing a mess of papers and splotches of a dark colored substance on the floor, what he assumed was blood from hunting animals. 

“Alright, I’ll leave you be sorry for interrupting anything” 

They both smiled at each other for a moment, and Zayn felt relieved that the man would soon be gone.

As the man turned to leave, a loud scream for help was heard from inside the building, startling both of them. 

Almost instantly, the man turned back around and charged at Zayn. 

Zayn didn’t have a moment to react as he was forcefully pushed back inside of the building by the man, letting go of the knife behind his back. 

The screaming continued as Zayn and the older man fought each other on the floor. The man was surprisingly strong for his age and was winning the fight, striking Zayn several times across the face. Each one leaving him dazed and in pain. 

Zayn felt a sudden pause as he saw the man look up towards the room Niall was in, his screams getting louder and more desperate, and took this opportunity to punch him across the face. 

The man tumbled over onto his side clearly taken by surprise from Zayn's sudden attack. 

Zayn stood up quickly making his way up the stairs towards Niall. His head throbbed with pain due to the punches he withstood. He carefully made his way up the stairs and stopped abruptly when he heard the sound of a gun being cocked behind him.

He turned around slowly to face the man, his gun never leaving Zayn.

“Let him go!” The man screamed authoritatively. 

He kept his gun drawn directly to the much taller and angry looking young man in front of him as he struggled to walk closer. Zayn’s lips twitched into a smile, wiping off the blood from the side of his mouth with his open palm. His eyes bore into the man in front of him and he knew what he had to do next. 

“I can’t do that sir. He belongs to ME” he screamed while pointing behind him, his booming voice making the man jump. 

“You have him don’t you? The boy everyone’s looking for” the man said in a pained whisper. 

He had seen the boy’s face everywhere in town and had felt a deep sorrow for him, since his own son had gone missing a few months prior and was now presumed dead.

Zayn laughed at how stupid and very dead this man would soon be. 

“Yeah, I do” Zayn smiled as if he had just admitted to having the winning numbers for the lottery. He climbed back down the stairs and walked slowly towards the man. 

The older man's hand shook as the darker haired boy walked towards him. The gun was now directly in front of Zayn's chest as he towered over the smaller man. 

“No need to be scared” Zayn taunted. 

Niall cried out again, his pleas for help were beginning to sound hoarse from all his screaming. 

Zayn smiled again and watched as the old man began to shake with fear. 

“Don’t worry, he’s scared too” Zayn said calmly as he motioned behind him towards Niall. 

“He’s  _ mine _ and if you dare take him away from me, I’ll kill you” his voice dripped with malice, his eyes roaming over the man’s face. 

He slowly placed his hands on the barrel of the handgun that was on his chest and brought it downwards, finally taking it in one quick motion away from the man. 

“On second thought. Tell me, am I the most dangerous animal you’ve encountered?” he said as he placed the gun to the man’s forehead. 

The old man looked up and locked eyes with Zayn, breathing out shakily, he slowly nodded. He stopped putting up a fight and closed his eyes, fully accepting his fate and wondering what he would say to his son when he finally saw him.

Every action was done so carefully and slow. 

Zayn looked at the man one last time and pulled the trigger. The blood splatter went all over his face and his clothes. His ears rang from the close proximity of the gun being shot off. Zayn had never shot anyone with a gun before, and didn’t know how much of a mess it would make. The man’s lifeless body collapsed face down on the ground, with a loud thud. Streams of blood flowed from his severely open wound and collected in a dark pool around his head. Zayn pocketed the gun behind him and calmly made his way up the stairs towards Niall. 

_ N.H _

I jumped back as I heard the sound of a gunshot going off. My eyes darted across the room, the candle that illuminated my surroundings was almost burned out. I bit at the duct tape that bound my wrists together but it was wrapped around too many times to even make a dent. I had pulled the duct tape around my mouth down to my neck with my fingers and successfully ripped it off. I got up from my place in the corner and moved quickly to the door as I heard footsteps slowly approaching me. The door opened slowly and my smile faltered as I saw that the person in front of me wasn’t my savior who I had longed for, but was the devil himself.

Zayn made his way into the room and I gasped at the horrifying sight of him. His face was covered in blood and he had the most evil crazed look in his eyes. 

My skin crawled watching him smile and lick off the splattered blood from his lips. 

“He really tried, and look where it got him” 

He walked closer to me and gently cupped my face, a laugh escaping him. 

“And look where it’s gotten you” 

He took the side of my face and slammed my head angrily against the wall beside me.

I fell to the floor, my head throbbing with intense pain. I instinctively put my arms in front of me, shielding my face and head from him. 

He began to kick me on my side and I shrieked out in pain when I heard a loud crack emit from my chest. He stopped kicking me and crouched down to my level. I was shaking in pain and in fear and flinched when he carefully touched my chest with his hand, feeling around for something. 

He frowned when he felt a protruding rib from under his touch. 

“You’re so fucking weak” 

He grabbed my arm and stood me up forcefully. He dragged me out of the room, ignoring my cries of pain with each step we took. 

He cut my hands free with a knife and led me down the stairs. I screamed in terror at the sight of a man on the floor in a pool of his own blood. His skull was in fragments across the floor followed by his brain that was now mush. 

He pushed me closer to the body and threw me down next to it. The smell was horrible, the metallic scent of blood filled the entire room. I couldn’t suppress myself and heaved the contents of my stomach next to me. 

“You did this. He died because of you. He wanted to help you leave me, but he didn’t know it would cost him his life” he spat, each word laced with venom 

He got a shovel from the side of the stairs and threw it down at my feet. 

“Bury him” 

I looked up at him, shaking my head and silently pleading with him. 

“NOW!” He yelled so loudly it echoed through the room. 

I flinched at his loud voice and scrambled up to my feet, looking down at the poor man below me. I struggled to pick up his feet and couldn’t even move him an inch towards the door. 

Zayn, now clearly frustrated, pushed me to the side. In one quick movement, he had picked up the man and dropped him down on the snow outside. He turned back to me and gestured for me to come outside, his eyes never leaving mine. 

I slowly made my way outside and hugged myself against the cold weather. He threw the shovel at my feet again and pointed to the ground next to him. 

“Dig” 

I slowly picked up the shovel and struggled to keep it in my hands. 

I looked past him and saw a clearing behind him, followed by a path that led out into the woods. 

He kept his gaze down towards the body In front of him and I took this opportunity to gather my courage, and hit him across his head with the shovel. 

A dull thud emitted through the woods which broke the peaceful silence. He fell to the ground, clutching his head as he cried out in pain. 

It took every ounce of energy I had to run as fast as I could away from him. 

I didn’t look back but I could hear him scream out in anger. 

I ran for what seemed like forever and when I stopped to catch my breath, I didn’t see him behind me or hear anyone around me. I was still extremely paranoid and kept glancing over my shoulder every so often to make sure I was alone. I didn’t know where I was going or where I was. All the trees I passed looked exactly the same and the snow had stopped falling, making it a bit easier to travel through. 

I kept going in the same direction and soon came to an abandoned camp. 

There were four tents set up around a snow covered campfire pit in the middle. I ran to a red tent that was closest to me and kneeled down, tearing the zipper open to reveal what was inside. 

I fell back in horror and screamed at the contents I had found. 

Two frozen corpses lay next to each other. The blood around their throats where they had been slit, was crystallized with ice along with their clothing. It looked like they had been here for months. 

The bodies laid awkwardly, their arms contorted into angles that were impossible for any normal person to achieve. I blinked back my tears and carefully got up from my place on the ground. I slowly made my way over to the other tent and shakily took the zipper in my fingers. I dragged it down to reveal the same awful sight. I sobbed into my hands seeing that it was a child, no older than 5. 

His small frame was curled up into a ball. His light brown hair was coated with remains of blood and ice. I leaned more into the tent and saw a shiny object next to him. 

I slowly reached over and picked up the knife that was most likely used to kill him. I hesitantly took it in my hands and threw it outside the tent. The blood was still splashed on the blade of the knife and I cried out as a revelation dawned on me. 

Zayn killed them.

There was no one out here for miles and it was the only legitimate explanation for this horrible gruesome scene I just witnessed. No one else was capable of committing such a violent and senseless crime except Zayn. He’s a psychopath, someone who has no empathy for others and someone who enjoys watching others suffer. 

I slowly zipped the tent back up and silently prayed for the boy and who I assumed was his family. I sat back in the snow and sobbed at how awful it must have been for him to have his life cut so short and taken so suddenly. I didn’t even want to inspect the other tents, also afraid of what else I would find. 

I was snapped out of my torment by the sound of someone approaching the camp site. I turned around and saw no one. Feeling paranoid, I turned back around to face the tent and saw Zayn standing at least 10 feet away from me. A frown covering his lips. He had dried blood across his forehead, some strands of hair coated with the substance, and had a fresh cut that was visible by his temple. 

I didn’t realize I had hit him that hard. 

I quickly got up and grabbed the bloodied knife I had thrown out. I held it towards him, my whole body shaking with fear. 

He stepped a bit closer to me while holding his hands up, as if he had just been caught by police 

“Be careful with that” 

He mocked, taking small steps towards me 

Tears sprang from my eyes as I looked at the red tent, imagining the dead boy inside, and looked back at Zayn. 

“Why did you kill him!? He was just a kid!” I screamed accusingly at him 

He sighed and closed his eyes, in frustration. 

“I didn’t need a child here ” he said clearly annoyed at me. He eyed the boy’s tent and walked closer to it. 

I never took the knife off from him, still holding it out steadily even though I was shaking from fear on the inside.

“It didn’t help that he was so fucking annoying. I had to shut him up somehow”

He talked so nonchalantly about why he murdering a child as if it was pertaining to the weather. 

He truly didn’t have a soul, or a heart for that matter. 

He walked closer to me so that we were now a few feet apart. I kept the knife out in front of me, and swung it at him. My tears blurring my vision and I flinched once I felt the tip of the knife come into contact with his chest. He towered over me as I looked up at him. The close proximity of him was engulfing my frame and the intoxicating smell of smoke and blood filled my nose. 

He harshly took the bloodied knife from my hand and threw it to the ground. 

I was exhausted and spent out from running and fighting. 

I held my head down in defeat and looked at my snow stained shoes. 

“You won” I whispered against my shaking lips 

I felt his cold finger tilt my chin up to look at him. His honey brown eyes stared blankly at me, void of any emotion I could make out. His stubble had grown even more, making him look much older than what he appeared, and for a split second I wondered if we would be friends if I had met him in a different situation, one where he wasn’t a deranged murderer. 

His eyelashes were adorned with small snowflakes that had fallen throughout the time he had been looking for me and I couldn’t keep my eyes away from the open wound that went up his temple and cut into his eyebrow. 

He was also examining me too, his eyes darted across my face and finally settled on my eyes. 

I couldn’t help but flinch when he lifted his hand up to comb through my hair. His movements were meticulous and careful as he took strands of my hair into his fingertips. He took his other hand and cupped the side of my face. The pad of his thumb softly swiped across my cheekbone then moved down towards my mouth as he slowly moved his thumb across my bottom lip. 

His hand finally moved down slowly towards my throat. 

I closed my eyes as I knew the beating I was about to receive would be bloody and relentless, but instead I felt a warm pair of lips touch my own.

My breath hitched in my throat as I kept my eyes closed.

He kissed me slowly, his mouth feeling like hot coals against my cold lips. His tongue swiped across my bottom lip, urging me to kiss back, but I just couldn’t bring myself to. 

He pulled away but I could still feel his lips lingering over my own, unsure of what to do next. I then felt him pull back completely as the familiar cold wind engulfed me once again. 

I had never been kissed before and felt extreme confusion over his actions. A million thoughts ran through my mind. 

I opened my eyes and stared at him. Strands of his dark hair had fallen out onto his face, swaying calmly with the wind. 

Then his whole demeanor changed once again, and the familiar feeling of excruciating pain fell upon me. 

He tightened the grip he had on my neck and brought me down to the floor. He was straddling me, his other hand now aiding him in choking me. He began to strike me repeatedly across my face. I screamed at him to stop and put my arms up to defend myself but he only punched me harder. He got a hold of my arms and pried them to the side, taking this chance to hit me with such hate and force that I could feel the inside of my mouth swell with blood. I lay still, exhausted and in such pain the salt from my tears stung the fresh cuts that were now on my face.

It physically hurt to cry. 

He was still straddling me, looking down at me with intense hate that I could make out with my almost swollen shut eyes. I turned to the side and coughed out the blood that had accumulated in my mouth and let it fall freely onto the ground beneath me. 

The brilliant white snow was now painted a dark red as more blood escaped my mouth. 

He slowly leaned over me and I instinctively closed my eyes shut. I would surely die if he were to beat me again and my body would soon join the boy in the tent. 

He turned my face with his fingertips and held my jaw in place so that I had no other choice than to stare up at him. 

“I hate you! I fucking hate you!” He yelled into my face. 

I flinched at his tone of voice and was relieved when I heard him grunt as he got off of me. He lifted me up by my arm harshly towards him and he dragged me back into the woods. His words were still ringing in my ears, the thought of someone hating me and screaming it to my face was something I never knew I would get to experience. Let alone, from a serial killer. 

We walked back to the building in silence, his hand never left my upper arm as he held onto it so tightly I was sure to get a bruise. 

When we got back to the abandoned building, he led me inside and upstairs, back into the room I had spent the last week in. He glared at me and slammed the door behind him as he left, locking it from the outside. 

I sat dazed by the intense pain and made my way to my bed, my whole body hurt and all I wanted to do was sleep until I couldn’t wake up anymore. 


	6. 6

I was woken up by Zayn barging into my room.

The loud shrill creaking of the door made me wince followed by the pain that suddenly rushed to my injuries. 

“Come here” he outstretched his arm to me and beckoned me with his fingers. 

I hesitantly moved my limbs to get out of bed but whimpered at the sharp pain in my body. I bit my lip, forcing myself not to cry in front of him. 

He scoffed at me and in an act of what I could only perceive as annoyance, took me into his arms. 

He carried me down a dark hall and into another dimly lit room. The room was illuminated by 3 portable lanterns and did not have much furniture except for a metal bathtub in the middle . It looked ready to collapse with dents on the sides and orange tinges of rust towards the bottom. 

He set me down and awkwardly walked over to the tub, dipping his fingers into the water.

“It's hard to get hot water from outside and into this tub, and you clearly are in need of a bath”

I looked at him in total confusion.

“Why would you do this for someone you hate” 

He swallowed hard and glared at me. I mentally scolded myself for being stupid and asking such dumb questions that will likely get me beaten again. 

He shook his head and ran his hand over his face to mask his anger. 

“Get in the tub Niall… please”

I didn't want him to get angry, so I did as I was told. My eyes watered with tears as I slowly made my way to the tub. He turned around as I undressed which was ironic considering he had already forcibly seen me naked.

I shakily lowered myself into the tub, my muscles instantly relaxing at the contact of the warm water against my broken skin. The dried blood on my body dissipated off of my skin and into the water around me making small swirls float around on the surface. 

Zayn looked back over his shoulder and began to approach me when he saw me in the tub. He crouched down to me and reached his hand to my face. I hugged my knees to my chest and began to cry as I remembered all of the awful things he had done to me. I lost the inner battle within myself to fight back my tears but I just couldn't hold them back anymore. 

He ran his fingers along my cheek and brushed away my tears as I cried. I was deathly afraid of what Zayn would do to me since he threatened to rip my eyes out the last time I cried in front of him. 

I heaved silently as I sobbed into my knees. 

I felt a warm cloth being placed on my back and being run over my shoulders. The water from the cloth streaked down my chest and arms. 

“Why do you hate me so much ” I whispered, my shaking lips made it hard to speak. 

He looked down to his lap and slowly brought his eyes to mine. 

“Now isn’t the time, let’s just focus on getting you clean” he said blankly. 

I closed my eyes knowing that if i persisted further, it could end badly for me but i just needed to know. 

“Please” my heart thumped in my chest with anguish. 

He sighed and dropped the washcloth in the water beside me making a small splash. 

He brought his fingers to his temples and closed his eyes. Through parted lips, he breathed out another sigh and cleared his throat. 

“You’re everything I… I wish I could be”

I raised my head from my knees and stared at his eyes that had been glossed over with tears. 

This might have been the first time I had ever seen him on the verge of crying, or of experiencing any emotions other than anger or annoyance.

“You have parents that love you and are doing everything possible to find you, while I had parents that would rather have seen me dead, than call me their son” 

He quickly wiped away his tears and tried to disguise his wavering voice with a cough. 

“You’re smart, kind, and attractive and i… have been told my whole life I was a stupid ugly piece of shit that wouldn't amount to anything” 

I was quiet for a moment unsure of how to respond. I felt the water around my body begin to lose its warmth and my toes start to wrinkle. 

“Your parents… did you…” I couldn't bring myself to say the words. 

“Kill them?” he paused for a moment and the familiar flicker of anger ignited within him.

“Not the way I would have liked to” 

He gathered the washcloth that was beside me and began to wash my arms, gently going over my bruises.

“They had killed my sister and buried her in our backyard while I was away at school. It was awful, just horrible, and you could imagine how I felt after knowing what happened... I lost it. I should have killed them slowly, made  _ them  _ feel all the awful things she must have felt, but instead i just-- burned our house down with them in it.” 

He wiped another stray tear with the back of his hand and wringed out the wash cloth to expel the water it had absorbed. I glanced at his hands and noticed the scabs on his knuckles had begun to bleed. I didn’t know what overcame me at that moment, when I reached out and took both of his hands in mine and brought them down into the warm water next to me. He flinched at the sudden contact of my hands holding his larger ones in my palms under the water. The water traced the outlines of his knuckles and washed away the dried blood into the now murky tub. His hands shook within my own as a single tear ran down his cheek. I was conflicted on the inside, seeing how vulnerable this man was before me and knew that showing him this small act of kindness was a mistake. The scabbed bloody hands that were in my palms had aided in killing so many people and were now being tenderly held within my fingertips. 

I slowly let my hands fall deeper into the water and in doing this, I let go of his own hands. 

He raised his eyes to look at me, his tear stained honey brown eyes held a gleam of sadness that I never knew he was capable of holding. At that moment I felt as though the tables had turned. I felt as though I was the one inflicting pain onto him and watching his eyes plead for me to stop. 

That's something he must see from me everyday; a tear stained face and sadness in my eyes. 

It didn't take a fool to know how badly Zayn was hurting on the inside. The more I looked at him crumble into tears beside me, the more I realized he was just a scared little boy who had to grow up too quickly in order to survive the horrible ordeal that was his childhood. 

He rapidly took his hands from out of the tub and wiped them on the side of his thermals. He harshly wiped any trace of tears from his face and stood up from beside me. The all too familiar scowl I had grown used to, had found its way back to his face. 

“When you’re done I want you to drain the tub outside” he said coldly. Any trace of vulnerability or sadness had diminished within seconds and all that was left was this monster of a human being, the sad scared boy I had seen earlier was dead, secluded deep within himself. 

_ Day 13 _

I was now fully healed from my injuries caused by the time I tried to escape. My broken rib was the only thing that hadn’t healed and the pain remained a constant. I had begged him to take me to a hospital but that had resulted in another beating so I ultimately gave up. I managed to steal a shard of a broken mirror I had found while roaming around the building and was noting the healing process of my wounds. 

What I first saw when I looked into the piece of mirror scared me beyond belief. It was a completely different person staring back at me and I was scared that the old me would never return. 

My eyes were no longer the bright cerulean color they once were, but were now replaced with a dull, lifeless hue of blue. I had purple discoloration under my eyes from lack of sleep that made my eyes look like they were sunken in. I still had bruises on my cheeks and on my temples, some were fresh with tinges of blue and purple, and some old with hues of green and brown. I was much paler than before and I didn’t need a mirror to know how thin I was getting. 

I was running out of time and I needed to get out of here quickly but the only way to do that was to gain Zayn’s trust. 

I began to listen to him. I was obedient and did whatever he asked me to. He never kissed me again since the time I tried escaping and had never tried to touch me sexually either. I was more than grateful for that, but no matter how hard I tried to please him, it didn’t stop his violent outbursts. He didn’t open up to me anymore about his childhood or about anything at all, which was somewhat disappointing. I wanted to figure him out. He was an enigma, a puzzle that couldn’t be solved, or those who did manage to solve it ended up dead. 

—

I stared dully at the wall in front of me, imagining what I would be doing at this exact moment if I was home. If I had never been taken. My daydreams were interrupted by a sliver of sunlight hitting my face. It was rare to see the sun this early in the morning since the sky was always filled with grey and gloom, much like my mood. I turned slightly towards the boarded up window and basked in the small ray of warmth until a cloud glided over the sun, stealing the warmth with it. 

I laid in bed until I heard a knock at my door and Zayn make his way inside. I was surprised that he was still here this early in the morning. I had memorized his routine and noted how he would always leave first thing in the morning and would return before dusk. 

He set down a fresh pair of clothes and some snow boots across from me. 

“Put these on. You’re helping me cut down some firewood” 

And with that he walked out of the room and left me alone to change. 

It was a simple change of clothes, consisting of clean undergarments with a black long sleeve followed by a large red winter coat and thermal pants. 

I walked out into the hallway and made my way downstairs where he was sitting down eating breakfast. He motioned for me to sit at the table and I hesitantly did. I never got used to sitting with him at the dining table and acting as if we were roommates enjoying the start of our day. 

We ate in silence, as usual and I took small bites of my food never really feeling hungry. 

We made our way outside and he watched me like a hawk, ensuring I didn’t escape again. 

We did our work in silence until sundown and I stood outside, basking in the freezing cold of the air and how soothing it was against my face, while zayn hauled the pieces of wood we had cut back inside the building. 

Once outside, he continued to watch me until he decided he had enough and took me by my arm, pushing me inside. He locked the large metal door behind him and looked back at me and cleared his throat.

“You’re going into town with me tonight” He said more in a statement than a question. Something I was now used to since he never asked me to do anything, he only demanded. 

I was surprised that he wanted me to go with him considering how much of a risk it would be to bring me outside into town, with him knowing I could escape or call for help. 

I hid my excitement that I was finally going home since I wouldn’t waste any time trying to escape or telling someone of the hell I’ve been through. 

I quietly nodded and saw him eye me suspiciously. . 

He walked towards me, closing the small gap between us, making me avert my own eyes away from his piercing golden ones. 

He took my face into his hands and spoke slowly, ensuring that I understood every detail. 

“If you try anything, anything at all, to try and leave me or alert the police, I’ll fucking  _ slit  _ your throat on the spot” 

I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. I was beyond petrified and began to over think my chances of escaping. 

He lifted my chin up to look at him and he stared angrily at me, as if he could see right through me. 

“If I don’t get the chance to cut that pretty neck of yours, I’ll have no choice but to use this” 

He then took a handgun out of his jacket pocket and rested the tip of the barrel against my temple. 

“You’ve been warned, Niall” 

He let go of me, pushing me back and muttered out for me to get ready. 


	7. 7

I went up to my room and tucked the shard of broken glass into the waistband of my sweatpants. I pulled on another sweater and breathed out, feeling my stomach knot up with fear and worry. I timidly made my way downstairs towards him and whispered that I was ready to go. 

He didn’t say anything but instructed me to turn around so that my back was facing him. 

I felt his hands rest on my shoulders before pulling back and placing a soft fabric over my eyes. I flinched at the dark blindfold that obscured my vision and he coldly told me to relax as I felt the blind fold being tied behind my head. 

He turned me around and asked if I could see anything, and when I said no, he took me tightly by my arm and led me out towards the exit. 

We were finally outside, I could tell by the change in temperature and by the crunching of snow beneath our feet as he dragged me further out and away from the building. We had walked for what I assumed had been 10 minutes before he stopped abruptly, pulling me back towards him.

“Stay here” he muttered and walked away quickly, his shoulder brushing past me. 

I waited until I could no longer hear his footsteps and shot my hands up towards the blindfold. I felt the smooth fabric that covered my eyes and gently tugged it down, so that it hung around my neck. I took in my surroundings, noticing that he had left me near a frozen lake. It was hard to make out where he had gone, since the sun was setting quickly and casting a dark shadow over every tree near me. 

“What the fuck are you doing?” 

I jumped at the sound of his booming voice echoing around me. I immediately pulled the blindfold back on and sat down, hugging my legs to my chest. I was shaking and terrified with every step he took closer towards me. 

He finally reached me and pulled me up by my hair so hard I felt tears welled up in my eyes from the pain. 

He ripped the blindfold off and slapped me harshly across my face. I fell to the floor and clutched my cheek in pain. It was on fire and numb from the hard impact of his hand. I laid still, blood trickled from the corner of my mouth and a single drop fell onto the snow beneath me. 

The silence that surrounded us was deafening and eerie as he stood over me. He finally lifted me up again from my arm and dragged me with him, seeming to forget the idea of the blindfold. We came to a clearing, a car covered with a brown tarp resided in the middle. He let go of my arm and walked quickly over to the car to uncover an old beat down truck. Remnants of orange were still visible of the truck’s original color, but now it was badly chipped and rusted from what I could guess were the many winters it endured. 

He unlocked the passenger side of the door and came back to take my arm in his hand, leading me towards it. He practically threw me in and locked the door from the outside and then raced to the driver side and quickly got in, locking the door. 

We sat in silence before he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a dark fabric. 

“Look at me” he commanded. 

I hesitantly turned to my side without making eye contact with him. He reached out and touched my hair, matting it down and combing it with his fingers to the side. He then took the fabric in his hands and held it there for a moment, looking down at it sadly. I now saw that it was a beanie with a pattern of white snowflakes across the middle. 

“This was Walihya’s. She gave this to me before she...” 

He trailed off and squeezed the beanie in his hands before breathing out shakily, his hair falling over his forehead and eyes, obscuring me from seeing him cry. 

I sat quietly in my seat, his silent cries made me feel an inexplicable amount of emotions. I felt sad for him but a great part of me felt glad that he was crying and suffering. 

He deserved it. 

He stopped crying and wiped his tears with the back of his sleeve. He reached over to me and placed the beanie on my head, pulling it down so that it covered my ears. He tucked the last bit of blonde strands I had underneath the beanie and noted how long my hair had grown. 

I only nodded, keeping my gaze down at my lap. My cheek still stung with pain, but as with every punch, blow or kick he inflicted on me, the pain subsided to numbness. 

He stared at me for a moment and then took my chin in his fingertips, turning my head to look at the beanie that adorned my head. 

“it’s yours now” he said with sadness in his voice. 

He turned back around and turned the key ignition, the truck roaring to life, causing the serene quietness of the forest to fill with the sound of an old motor trying to stay alive. 

He drove us out further into the forest but I now knew that we were actually leaving it behind. I was astonished at how deep into the forest we were when we finally reached the road I had been taken from. I looked around to see if I could spot my car, but it was nowhere to be seen. 

“If you’re looking for your car, I pushed it to the side of the road over there” 

He pointed his finger to the side of him and all I could see were dark menacing trees. 

“There’s a 200 foot drop beyond those trees. Your car is at the bottom of it” he spoke nonchalantly and placed his hand back on the steering wheel. 

“You pushed my car down a cliff!?” I exclaimed, my eyebrows furrowing with disbelief. 

He turned to me and I could tell he was getting annoyed, but I pushed further for his answer. 

“I needed to get rid of it, and setting it on fire would have brought unwanted attention. You won’t be needing it anymore so I don’t understand what the big deal is ” he said, never taking his gaze from the road. 

“I… that car-” 

“Just stop! Let it go already!” He yelled and turned to glare at me. 

I turned back around and looked outside the window at the passing scenery. I had worked sleepless nights in order to raise enough money for that car, and I remembered feeling so accomplished when I finally managed to buy it, but now I felt defeated and frustrated that there isn’t anything I could do to bring it back, along with the many other things he’s taken from me. 

We sat in silence all throughout the rest of the car ride, only the passing wind making a sound. I began to drift off to sleep, my eyes failing to keep themselves open and my vision coming in and out of focus. I gave in to the sleep and rested my head to the side, against the cold passenger window.

-

I was jolted awake by Zayn as he gripped my shoulder and continued to shake me awake. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and squinted at the many car lights that were in front of us. We were at a car checkpoint, and were trapped between all of the cars ahead and behind us. In the distance I saw a police officer lean against the driver side of a car and talk to the person inside, then turn back and hold his hand up signaling for the car to drive off. We were about four cars away from the police officers. Zayn was noticeably worried as he began to look around the compartments of the truck and hastily pulled out a scarf from behind his seat. He pulled me towards him and wrapped it around me, hurriedly tucking any visible blonde hair back into the beanie. 

He pulled it further down over my face, obscuring my vision a bit before reaching into his jacket to pull something out. He jabbed something hard and cold against my leg and I inhaled sharply when I saw the gun he had pulled out. 

“If you say anything, you’re dead” 

I shivered at his cold and menacing threat. His eyes were dark and piercing as they locked onto me. He glared at me one last time before turning back around and slowly driving forward, tucking the gun underneath his leg, meaning that we were next. 

I kept my eyes locked onto the dark road ahead of us, not daring to look at the officer.

I heard Zayn roll down his window, clearing his throat before he spoke out. 

“Hello officer, what seems to be the matter?” he said, trying to feign a concerned tone. 

“My department is helping an ongoing search party that’s taking place right now around this forest. We’re trying to bring awareness to a boy that’s been missing for quite some time now and we’re afraid we might be too late. His name is Niall Horan. Have you heard of him?” 

I froze at the sound of my name. 

I wanted to scream at him that I was alive, that I wasn’t dead, but all I could do was sit quietly and watch the dark road ahead of me. My heart sank at the thought of my parents thinking I was dead and wouldn’t be with them anymore. 

“Yeah I’ve heard of him. Such a sad thing to happen to such a nice looking boy” 

I turned my head a bit to look at him. His face was gazing down at a paper the officer had handed him, it was a new missing persons flyer that contained more pictures of me. 

“It truly is a tragedy” the officer spoke quietly. 

I then saw the officer’s gaze shift towards me. I panicked and quickly turned away from him to look out at the passenger window beside me. 

“Are you alright son?” 

I swallowed hard, my throat becoming dry and nodded quickly, my eyes still not meeting his. 

“He’s fine. He’s feeling a bit under the weather and we’re… actually going into town to get some medicine” Zayn said, answering for me. 

“Well he can tell me that, can’t he?” the officer retorted. 

I could feel both pairs of eyes on me. I could feel Zayn's eyes burning into me without even looking at him and I could feel the officers eyes waiting for me to speak. 

“I-I’m fine” I managed to speak out. My voice was shaky and hoarse, making my throat itch at how dry it was. 

I could see the officer nod through my peripheral vision, wearily eyeing me before quietly muttering a “have a good night” 

Zayn pulled up the window and drove off leaving us in silence, the only sounds filling the space between us were my not so silent cries. 

“I’ll have to gauge your eyes out if you don’t stop crying” he glared at me, tightening his hands on the steering wheel. 

I bit my tongue hard and kept my gaze down towards my lap, scared that I might make him angry. 

“Why don’t you feel grateful that someone took you away from your shitty life?” 

My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. I hadn’t told many about my strained relationship with my parents because of our financial problems due to my school, or how I didn't have many close friends with the exception of Louis, but all of this wasn’t enough for me to go and run away from my life. I was beginning to feel angry at his stupid remarks. Did he really think he was the hero for taking me?

“I did have a good life! I had a great life until you barged your way into it!” I said loudly, almost to the tier of yelling. 

“You took me away from  _ everything _ . Everything I ever had and you’re holding me captive in some run down building, torturing me relentlessly and expect me to be grateful?” I didn’t care that I was yelling despite the silence that surrounded us. 

He turned to glare at me, his face contorted with anger. 

“Watch your tone” he threatened. 

“What more do you want from me? You’ve taken everything” my tears fell freely as I sat back in thought. He was more than willing to take my life as well, I had already seen what he was capable of.

A frown began to take over his lips as his jaw clenched with what I knew was anger. He hurriedly pulled over onto the side of the road and reached over, taking me by the front of my sweatshirt and pulled me close to him. 

“I can take whatever I want from you, and I did all of this for you. Everything was for you. You won’t admit it but you were unhappy. I would know.” 

I felt the shard of glass poke me from underneath my waistband. I was so consumed with anger that I didn't think twice before reaching out and grasping it in my hands. I slowly brought it out into view and began to swing the blade toward his face when he caught my forearm with his other hand. He dug his nails into my flesh, forcing me to drop the sharp piece of glass. His eyes traveled from the glass on the floor of the truck, to my face. 

“You think a piece of glass is going to hurt me?” he scoffed. 

“Well a shovel did” I retorted with no hesitation. 

He glared at me and let me go harshly, pushing me back onto my side of the truck. He rubbed his eyes with his hands and sighed quietly. He closed his eyes for a moment and after a long silence he cleared his throat.

“I don't want to hear from you anymore. Not until we get there ” he said with a tone that was hard to distinguish. 

I glared at him but nodded, picking at a loose piece of thread that hung off of my jacket. 


	8. 8

  
  
We had been driving in complete silence for an hour, I never once dared to look his way and kept my head turned to look outside my own window. I counted every tree we passed by and noted how dark this stretch of road was. My mind got the best of me as I thought about this whole trip being a plan to take me far away and kill me, but he would have done that a long time ago. 

I relaxed my tensed shoulders as we finally came to the outskirts of a town, a large supermarket parking lot was what greeted us first. The very same supermarket where i had shopped many times before, without a single care in the world. It was empty and dimly lit, only five tall lamps illuminated the whole parking lot, making it more eerie and menacing. He shut off the engine and got out of the truck. He made his way over to me and pulled me out from my arm, his hands finding their way to my face. He cupped my face in both of his hands and pulled me closer to him, keeping his gaze fixed on something behind me. 

“This is what’s going to happen. You’re going to stay by my side and not talk to anyone and not look at anyone” he said, letting me go. 

I turned around slowly to see what he was looking at. A couple stood at the entrance of the supermarket, both of them staring our way. 

He slowly grabbed my jaw and directed my attention back to him. He pulled me into a hug and held my head against his chest. I could feel him lean his head down towards me and kiss the side of my face. I began to push against him, feeling disgusted but was stopped by his arms pulling me even closer into him. 

“Stop struggling” he whispered. His lips brushed against my ear, sending shivers all over my body. 

I reluctantly stopped and as fast as he had embraced me, he let me go. The warmth that I had felt while in his arms was suddenly replaced by the cold icy wind.

“Why did you do that?” I cautiously spoke out.

He pointed behind me, noting that the couple who was watching us had left. 

“I can't have anyone suspecting us and finding  _ you _ ” he pointed at me and took me by my arm, leading me to the supermarket. 

He Interlocked our fingers together, my small hand felt uncomfortable in his larger one and I could feel the calluses on the outside of his fingers, probably from years of heavy work. Despite the calluses, I noticed that he was warm and wondered how he always managed to maintain heat while I was constantly cold and shivering. 

Before we went inside he stopped to pull something out of his jacket. 

“Remember, a lot of lives are in your hands” he said, flashing the hand gun he had shown me earlier. 

He didn’t let me say anything and tugged my hand, leading us inside.

It was just as I had remembered it. 

The supermarket was huge, but only a few people were inside, buying necessities and groceries. 

I wanted to run away from Zayn and scream for help, but his hand held my own tightly, ensuring that I stayed by his side. His black combat boots tapped loudly over the beige tiled floor as he quickly directed both of us further away from the entrance and towards the cold meats section. The happy music that played around us, to ease shoppers, only made me feel more anxious and I felt a pang of sadness for myself at how oblivious these people were to what was happening, that the missing person they had been looking for was right here. 

Alive and among them 

We reached the cold meats section and he let go of my hand, instructing me to stay where I was and to not talk to anyone. I watched as he pulled packaged meats with his fingertips and piled them on top of each other so it would be easier to carry all together. My eyes darted around us, trying to find anyone that could help me. Not too far away, there was a woman inspecting the different types of packaged deli meats there were to offer and next to her, a small boy no older than five playing with a wind up toy car. I assumed it was her son judging by their striking similarities. 

I turned back around and watched Zayn as he glanced over the items in his hands, when I felt a small tap against my foot.

I looked down to find the toy car turned over by my shoe, and the little boy quickly rushing over to retrieve it. 

“ ‘scuse me mister” he said timidly as he reached down to pick up his toy. 

I knew this had gotten Zayn’s attention as I heard him drop what he had and stood beside me, snaking his fingers around my arm. 

The little boy stood there watching both of us and then outstretched his small arm to me, in an attempt to hand me the toy car. 

“Play?” he squealed happily, diminishing any trace of shyness.

His brown eyes roamed my face waiting for an answer.

“He doesn’t want to play” Zayn said coldly. This caused the little boy to whimper out in sadness, finally getting the attention of his mother as she walked over to us. 

“Andrew! What are you doing?” she called out to him as she approached us. Her black high heels tapped lightly against the floor while fixing her bag back onto her shoulder, and I knew she had to be an attorney of some sorts by the way she was dressed so elegantly. 

Zayn quickly turned me around and grabbed a hold of my wrist, he squeezed me tightly and began to push me back towards the entrance when we were stopped by the boy’s mother. 

“I'm so sorry about him, I didn’t mean for him to make you leave--” 

She stopped abruptly, finally taking a good look at both of us. 

My heart jumped in my chest as I could feel her eyes on me, studying me. Zayn angrily turned me around so that my back was towards her and I feared for what Zayn was about to do next. 

“Just pay attention to your kid” Zayn snapped. 

He turned around ready to lead us out once again, when the woman called out to  _ me.  _

“ _ Niall?" _

Her voice was soft and carried a hint of realization as if she was piecing together all of the events before her. I should have felt happy or relieved that someone recognized me and knew I was alive, but all I could feel was dread seeing Zayn clench his jaw in anger and reach into his coat pocket. He took out the pistol and pointed it at her

With no hesitation, he pulled the trigger. 

I screamed as I saw the woman fall to the floor. Her body collapsed in the middle of the frozen meats section in a small pool of blood. I fought against Zayn as I felt him wrap his arms around me, holding me back from running towards the woman and away from him. I cried watching her son rush over to her, his small frame draped over her torso, calling out to an unresponsive body. 

He roughly pulled me towards him and hurriedly dragged me through the different aisles in the store. I could distantly hear the screams of panic followed by a ‘ _ stop him! _ ’. 

People rushed to safety as everyone scrambled to find an exit and figure out who had shot the woman, but most importantly, find who had the means to kill. Their questions had been answered once shoppers saw the gun in Zayn’s hand and fingers latching around my arm tightly, pulling me along with him. 

He continued to drag me towards the exit when a man jumped in front of us, stopping Zayn from leaving. 

“Let him go” the man spoke calmly, his arms raised to show he didn't mean any harm, but Zayn didn’t care. 

He looked at the man and then back at me, my tear stained face was now uncovered and revealed to everyone who I really was and even Zayn knew there was no point in hiding me anymore.

In a split-second decision, he moved his arm around my neck and restrained me in a choke hold. I whimpered when I felt the tip of the gun rest against my temple, the cold piece of metal made me shudder in fright. 

“Move or I’ll fucking shoot him!” Zayn yelled at the man. 

He cowered back at the sudden boom of Zayn’s voice and I could see the slightest gleam of regret form in his eyes. He nodded and slowly stepped away from the exit which allowed us to move ahead. He still kept the gun drawn to my head until we finally reached the parking lot. 

I was a sobbing mess by everything that I had witnessed in just this short time. He had killed an innocent person right in front of me and didn’t even hesitate to shoot her. I knew what he was capable of and how many lives he had forever changed, which made me angry. 

Hot tears of anger rushed down my cheeks and I scrambled to wipe them with the back of my sleeve. He had his back turned to me while he fumbled with his keys and I balled my hand into a fist. With all of my strength, I brought down my fist on the back of his head.

He hissed in pain as he stumbled down onto his knee, his hand reached up to his head in an attempt to locate where I had hit him. 

I couldn’t believe I had done that. 

I looked at my balled fist, still reeling in from what I had done, and then back at Zayn as he was slowly getting up. My eyes widened at the forgotten realization that he had a gun and wouldn’t hesitate to kill me. 

I ran with fear as I knew the consequences I would endure would be deadly. 

I heard a loud boom of his gun being shot off and panicked upon seeing a single bullet whiz by my head. I turned around to see Zayn fuming with anger as he quickly began to run towards me. The blaring of police sirens in the distance startled both of us, and I knew I had to somehow delay Zayn so that they would reach me on time. 

“Get in the fucking car Niall!” he screamed at me while slowly pointing the gun to me. 

“I didn't hesitate to shoot at you, and you know I won't hesitate to kill you”

His eyes were cold and absent of any discernible emotion other than anger. I was extremely conflicted with what to do. There was the option to run away and risk being killed, or to comply with him and live long enough to see my family again. 

And that’s what I had to do. 

I defeatedly walked back to him, and he didn't hesitate to hurriedly grab my arm and rush me over to his truck. He practically threw me inside and ran around the car to the driver's seat and got in. 

He drove quickly out of the parking lot and onto the street. I looked behind my shoulder at the small group that had formed outside of the store entrance. I stared longingly at them, some of them with their phones out taking pictures of Zayn’s truck, and others making phone calls. 

For the first time in a while I had felt hope. 

People knew that I was alive and most importantly, they had seen my captor. Cameras had to have seen him and recorded both of our faces. This made the probability of finding me even more high. 

As we drove down the road, neither of us said a word. My guess was that he was too enraged or panicked to hit me or even say anything to me. The silence coated over us like the snow that had begun to fall outside, probably signaling the commencement of another storm. I hugged my arms around myself, feeling cold and took a peek at the outside mirror. 

I silently gasped as I saw the distant flashing of police lights. I bit my lip knowing well that this would anger Zayn even more. 

I slowly peered at him, his full concentration was devoted to the road ahead of him as he began to drive faster. He slowly looked up at the rearview mirror and frowned. 

“Shit” he cursed under his breath. He stepped on the gas pedal and I shrunk in my seat feeling terrified at the dangerous speed we were going. The trees and light posts zipped by as we were probably going well over 90 miles per hour. 

“This is all your fault. You just  _ had _ to bring attention to yourself” he scoffed and tightened the hold he had on the steering wheel. 

I stared back at him in disbelief. He truly thought it was my fault?

“You were the one who wanted to bring me, knowing it would be a risk” I silently countered. 

As soon as I said those words, I immediately regretted them. 

He turned and reached his arm out to me, trying to get a hold of me. I screamed at him to watch the road, but he only sped up. The engine revved loudly which only frightened me even more. 

“I did this for you! You fucking ungrateful  _ bitch _ ” 

I inched further away from him, begging for him to calm down which only made him angrier. 

He quickly turned the steering wheel to the side which sent the truck screeching as it tried to keep up with the sudden commands it was given. We drove off the road and into a dark unknown part of the forest. The thick blanket of trees concealed us from the road and my heart sank as I saw the many police cars begin to slowly disappear from view. 

We finally came to a halt as the truck jerked into place. 

He continued to stare straight ahead, his fingers turning a pale white as they gripped the steering wheel tightly. 

I slowly moved my hand for the door handle and gently pulled on it, not to alert him. I cursed under my breath when the door didn’t budge and remembered that he had locked it, the only way to open it being from the outside.

He snapped his head in my direction almost as if he had forgotten I was in the car with him. I expected him to jump on me and beat me, but he only glared at me and got out of the car, slamming the door harshly. He briskly made his way to the passenger side and unlocked the door with his keys. His eyes were dark as they continued to glare at me. His hair was disheveled and slightly glistened in the moonlight that shined above us. He roughly pulled me out by my jacket collar and onto the snow stained ground. I winced at the hard impact of my back against the floor and tried to get up but was harshly kicked in the face by his boot.

I cried out in pain as blood began to trickle down my nose and my eyes started to water. I felt dazed, the many trees in front of me swirled and the only thing that was steady enough for me to see was the white snow that began to blanket the floor around us. 

Zayn’s blurry figure came into view as he crouched down in front of me. I could faintly see something glisten in his hand and widened my eyes when I saw it was a large knife. I had no time to react and screamed out in pain when he suddenly plunged the knife into my thigh. It felt as though my leg had been set on fire and was travelling throughout my whole body. I felt weak and sick at the same time seeing blood seep through my navy blue thermals and a small puddle of blood begin to form underneath my leg. Hot tears sprang from my eyes as I looked at the bloody mess in front of me.

“Well you can’t run away, now can you?” he said viciously. 

He watched me like a hawk as I stared at the blade that stuck out of my leg, and almost as if he had read my mind, he reached over to grasp the knife’s handle and quickly pulled it out. 

I writhed at the excruciating pain that overtook me. My hands were balled into fists and I repeatedly slammed them down onto the ground next to me. I looked up at the cloudy sky above me, droplets of snow fell onto my face, but I didn't care. I pleaded for someone to find me and take me away from this evil man, to lock him away forever, but of course no one came. 

“I’m disappointed” he huffed. He ran his hand over his face and looked to the side, slightly shaking his head.

“I wanted this to work, I wanted you to…” he trailed off, his gaze finally met mine and I could see that his eyes were glossed over with tears. 

“To what? To let you do these...awful things to me?” i said bitterly between gasps of air. I shivered and weakly wrapped my arms around myself, starting to feel colder than usual. 

He shook his head and swallowed hard. 

“care for me...even  _ love _ me like I had for you” 

I was completely taken aback by his words. I cried into my blood coated hands and wanted to so desperately wake up from this nightmare. I wanted to be home with my parents, I wanted to be back in school, I wanted to be anywhere but here. 

“This isn’t love. This is torture” I cried out

“You don't hurt the people you love, and I’m sorry about what happened to you when you were younger but I t-think you have this... warped reality of what love is” 

I shakily propped myself on my elbow, my leg burning with pain as it continued to ooze blood. 

“But if you love me like you say you do, you would let me go” I said in a whisper. 

With tears in his eyes, he turned to glare at me. 

He reached down toward me and tried to stand me up but there was no way I could stand on my own considering I had a large stab wound on my thigh. I pleaded for him to leave me on the ground but he ignored me and roughly picked me up. I screamed at the pain on my leg and breathed out shakily, trying to stay calm. He dragged me over to the truck and slammed my back against the passenger door. I was pinned between his body and the truck behind me, making it impossible to get away from him, not that I could have anyway. 

He grabbed my face in his strong hands and refused to let me go. 

“You know I can't do that”

His eyes roamed over my face, studying me intently. 

He ran his pointer finger along the side of my face and stopped at the corner of my mouth. His eyes no longer held the dark anger I saw earlier but were replaced with sadness. His eyes welled up with tears once more, a pained expression took over his face as he slowly lowered his head to my shoulder and sobbed. 

His taller frame engulfed my body as he wept on my shoulder. His right hand snaked around my waist, pulling me even closer to him. I had no idea what to do or how to react, my only thoughts being on the immense pain that was creeping its way from my thigh to my whole body. He continued to embrace me, and held me tighter against him as if I had the capacity to run away again. 

He nuzzled his face into the crevice of my neck, making me wince at the slight discomfort of his stubble grazing my skin. I could feel the wetness of his tears as they fell onto me, one after the other in an incessant order. 

He leaned down further into the crook of my neck and placed a small kiss. I flinched at the close contact of his warmth and felt my stomach turn into knots at how close he was. His lips continued to linger on my skin for a few more seconds until he finally pulled away from me. His tear stained eyes gazed at the ground and looked tired but were more out of the ordinary since he was never the one to cry, it always being me. 

He held onto me making it so that I didn't tumble over because of my leg and carried me over to a ditch that was underneath a bed of trees. The small space was void of any shrubs and bushes but was well hidden from sight as it was about a foot deep into the ground. He let me down gently and bent down to fix my clothes. I eyed him wearily as his fingers fiddled with my jacket zipper and pulled it upwards. He smoothed out any wrinkles that were visible on my clothing with his palm and combed through my hair with his fingers. His golden brown eyes still held a visible gleam of sadness as his fingers found their way back to my face. 

“I know what i have to do now” he said just above a whisper

He got up slowly and walked back to the truck, flinging the passenger door open to look for something inside. Once he found what he needed, he closed the truck door and slowly made his way back to me. His right hand was inside his jacket pocket, fidgeting with something inside. 

He bit his bottom lip and furrowed his eyebrows in a pained expression, as if he was being coerced into doing something he didn't want to. 

“I-I… when I first saw you, I wanted this to work. I wanted  _ us _ to work”

He raised his hands and gestured to the space around us.

“I did all of this for you and you just… threw it away” 

The tears in his eyes had turned to tears of anger as he lunged at me and held me down on the ground. He forcefully got both of my wrists in his large hand and held them together, not allowing me to move. I cried and pleaded while he only ignored me and reached into his jacket pocket, pulling out a roll of duct tape and binding my wrists together. 

“Please let me go, please Zayn” I begged. My lips trembled from the immense cold I was feeling. It felt as though the snow outside had made its way into my bloodstream, chilling my body from the inside out. 

My eyes roamed his face, looking for any type of remorse of sadness that was evident before, but all of that was replaced with a hard look on his face, one of irritation. 

He ignored me once more and lifted me up by arm toward him. Our faces were mere inches away from each other and I wanted to run and hide in order to avoid his intense stare that I was currently under. 

With his other hand he grabbed a fistful of the sweatshirt underneath my jacket and pulled me even closer to him, diminishing the space between us. 

In an instant, he captured my lips within his own and kissed me desperately. He snaked his arm around my neck and rested his hand behind my head, holding me in place. He bit my bottom lip roughly, urging me to kiss back and I found myself complying in hopes that it would buy me some time. His lips were soft and warm, void of any cold from being outside. His mouth tasted of cigarettes and alcohol, which would explain why his clothes always smelled of that. His fingers had found their way to my jaw and gently grasped my face while he continued to deepen the kiss. 

He pulled away after a moment and held my face in his hands, not letting me go.

“I loved you” he breathed out. His breath fanned over my face, adding to the coldness that captured me. 

He stood up and wiped his tears with his sleeve, his cold hard eyes basically ripped right through me. 

He reached into his jacket and pulled out the pistol he had threatened me with earlier and cocked it in his hand. 

His eyes glanced over the gun, studying it meticulously. The silver ending of the barrel was shiny enough to reflect the white that was all over the floor.

I desperately looked around me for any weapons of sorts, a rock, a branch, anything I could use to defend myself but there was just the blanket of snow that surrounded us followed by a couple of dead leaves. I frantically gained the strength to move my leg and try to stand, but whimpered at the great deal of pain that coursed through my body. 

This amused him, as he diverted his attention from the gun and locked his eyes onto mine. 

“I've always killed with a knife. I think the act of using a knife on someone was more… personal, but I've grown fond of using this” 

He tilted the gun to the side and smiled sadly. 

“It will put you out of your misery. I promise” 

He pulled back the hammer of the pistol and pointed the gun at me. 

“Please don’t Zayn, Please. I’ll listen to you! I’ll be good!” 

I screamed at him, my tears never ceased to cascade down my face and only grew into hysteric cries as he brought the gun to my forehead and pulled the trigger. 


	9. 9

The courtroom remained silent. Everyone sat quietly in their seats, having no choice but to hear these disturbing details over the past two hours.

The attorney questioning him had also felt greatly unsettled the whole time, never having heard such gruesome acts being described to him by the killer himself. 

“After you shot Mr. Horan, what did you do?” 

The attorney questioned, not entirely wanting to know the answer.

Every person in the courtroom had mixed emotions presented on their faces, some were filled with disgust as Zayn recounted the awful things he had done to Niall, while others were so overcome with sympathy for the boy, that they wept silently in their seats. 

Zayn felt like a foreign specimen being examined by everyone in the room. He felt all of their eyes burn into him with extreme hatred that it caused him to slightly sink into his seat. 

“Mr. Malik? What did you do after you shot him?”

Pulled out of his thoughts, he composed himself and awkwardly cleared his throat. 

“I- um… I left” 

His voice quivered with something he had never felt before.

_ Guilt  _

The attorney nodded and asked a follow up question but Zayn didn’t listen to what was being asked. His mind was miles away from the courtroom he was in and was being held captive in the last few moments he spent with Niall. He wanted to rip away the look on Niall’s face that had haunted him for so long. He wanted to erase the unsettling image of Niall’s pale skin that was coated with fresh blood, his lips that turned a deadly shade of grey and his eyes that stared up at him, looking at him with the last few tears he would ever get to shed. 

“Mr. Malik please answer the question” the attorney said, crossing his arms in front of his chest. 

He had become inpatient with Zayn and desperately wanted the trial to be over already. There was already sufficient evidence to incarcerate him, so he didn't understand the need for a lengthy trial. 

The judge suddenly cleared his throat, startling Zayn who sat on the witness stand next to him. 

He ran his hand over his face and took off his glasses, setting them down gently in front of him. 

“Mr. Amos, I believe we have everything we need. I will allow the plea bargain Mr. Styles has proposed for his client and hear by commence the sentencing once we return from a much needed recess” 

Amos grudgingly made his way back to his seat and nodded, making Harry grin at how easily annoyed he had become. 

“Very well, we will resume in ten minutes” 

With the strike of his gavel, he ordered a pair of officers to escort Zayn and Harry to the outer benches where they could talk alone and not be interrupted by reporters or members of the public. 

Zayn walked briskly, the chains around his legs made it difficult to take his usual strides but he was grateful to be out of that courtroom even if it was for a mere ten minutes. Harry walked alongside Zayn as they made their way over to the benches, away from everyone else. 

Harry raised his arms to stretch, his lanky figure looked almost cartoonish to Zayn as he noted how out of place he looked in this setting. A tall man dressed in a business suit alongside himself, in an orange jumpsuit with chains around his legs and wrists. 

“Well, we practically settled the case. You’re not going to death row” Harry commented, taking a seat next to Zayn on the bench. 

Zayn shrugged. The shackles on him rattled and broke the uncomfortable silence between the two. 

“I wouldn’t mind dying” Zayn calmly retorted. 

Harry awkwardly laughed and averted his gaze to the drywall in front of them. 

The light tapping of shoes against the tile floor caught their attention as they saw an officer approaching both of them. 

Harry furrowed his eyebrows and raised his left wrist to look at his watch. 

“Ten minutes already!?” he exclaimed, which made Zayn wince at the joyful outburst of his young lawyer. 

“No, the district attorney would like a word with you” the officer said with an authoritative tone. 

Harry looked confused and glanced at Zayn with a worried look. 

He nodded at the officers and whispered a quick ‘I’ll be back’ to Zayn as two officers escorted him past a hallway where they disappeared around a corner. A single officer was left to watch Zayn, his left hand was placed on top of his gun holster and his other hand hung loosely on his side. 

After several minutes of uncomfortable silence between Zayn and the officer, Harry returned with a grim look on his face. 

“What did they say?” Zayn quietly whispered. 

Harry pursed his lips and cleared his throat before speaking. 

“A witness wants to make a statement, and the impact of the statement could likely alter the plea bargain, making it so that you could likely be given the death penalty... but this is all circumstantial” 

The idea of death didn't faze Zayn, it was a particular word Harry used that made him unsettled. 

“Witness?” 

Harry nodded and raised his hand to his forehead, sweeping strands of hair to the side. 

“It’s likely a family member, since no one survived…” 

“Yeah, I know” Zayn sighed feeling tired out from this court hearing. 

The doors to the courtroom swung open revealing the bailiff and several officers, signaling that the ten minute break had concluded. The officers escorted Zayn back into the courtroom as Harry lingered behind to gather any important documents from the district attorney’s assistant. 

Once the courtroom had settled in, the judge took his rightful place at the front of the room. 

“We are continuing the case of the county of west Yorksire against Zayn J. Malik. I have also been informed that a key witness in this case would like to make a brief statement, please allow them in” the judge motioned toward the large wooden doors that opened out into the building’s hallway. 

Zayn kept his gaze fixed on his lap. He didn’t care who it was and didn’t bother turning around to see. He could hear the soft gasps from people in the audience and cursed under his breath in annoyance. There was a slight tapping of metal on the tile floor, followed by the person clearing their throat. 

Zayn looked up to see a small smile overtake the judge’s lips. 

“Please, state you name" 

There was a slight pause followed by a wavering voice that cut through the courtroom's silence. 

“ _Niall Horan_ ” 

Zayn slowly raised his eyes from his lap and turned to the podium that was in the middle of the room.

It felt as though his chest was weighing him down like blocks of lead as his breath hitched in his throat.

There in the middle of the room stood the boy he was certain had died at the cause of his hand. He had vividly seen the blood drip from his head where he had put the bullet through. He had seen him laying on the ground as the snow piled around him

_ but here he was _

a few feet away, with crutches on either side of him that supported a large brace around his left leg while he struggled to keep himself upright. 

His hair was no longer blonde but had a deep brown peeking through his roots. The ghostly pale complexion he always dawned was replaced by a tint of pink that engulfed his cheeks and lips. He was still frail and thin with the majority of his scars being visible to everyone through his thin t-shirt

A million emotions overtook Zayn at that moment. 

The main ones being anger and confusion. 

"Mr. Horan, please continue" the judge encouraged. 

The brunette nodded and shakily took out a folded piece of paper from his pocket.

He looked over the paper, the many words that he jotted down stared up at him scarily. He had practiced what he was going to say, what he would do, but now he lost all courage to even read from the paper in which he had written down every emotion he felt. 

He crumpled the letter in his hands and steadied the microphone in front of him. 

"I shouldn't be alive right now. I should be dead, and if it were not for the ambulance and police that found me by pure luck, I would have been dead under the snow in that forest… but I'm here and I strongly believe that it's for one reason only… to get justice for the things an evil and vile person did to me and to so many others" 

Zayn's lips twitched into a smile, faint enough to not be caught by others in the room. He slowly balled his fists in his lap and continued to listen. 

"This man took everything away from me. He took me away from my life, from my parents, from my happiness… and I--I want to take this time to address him directly"

Niall's eyes shifted over to where Zayn sat next to his attorney. He was finally going to say the words he had been keeping bottled up inside of him. His hands shook slightly as he grasped the sides of the podium to steady himself. 

"Zayn, the things you have done to me and to the other victims who sadly can't be here to speak on their behalf, is just vile and beyond evil. I-- I had felt so much sympathy and pity for you when you told me about your childhood, about your  _ sister _ … but no matter how much you were hurting on the inside, it will  _ never _ justify what you did"

In a sudden burst of anger, Zayn stood abruptly. His chair hit the floor with a loud thud causing those near him to scream in fright. 

He turned to finally face Niall, his blue eyes reflected the all too familiar fear Zayn had maliciously grown to miss. 

"I should have fucking slit your throat when I had the  _ chance"  _ he yelled maliciously toward Niall. 

A crowd of police officers surrounded him and took hold of his arms when he attempted to lunge in the direction toward the scared brunette. 

Harry was stunned to see this sudden outburst come from his client and rushed over to Niall's side upon seeing him burst into tears. Niall ignored everyone who came to his aid, bombarding him with endless questions if he was alright. He felt it was a mistake confronting him and quickly made his way out of the courtroom with an entourage of people following close behind him. 

\--------------

The judge had paused the hearing for the day citing the outburst that had occurred in the courtroom. Almost simultaneously, a media frenzy ensued once talk of what happened had reached the news outlets with the most notable presses calling Zayn a 'remorseless monster'. 

Niall had quickly taken shelter in his room, replaying the events that had occurred earlier today. He sat on his carpet and winced at the occasional pulses of pain that ran up his injured leg. He should have been resting on his bed, like his doctor and mother have been telling him, but he preferred the comfort of his floor for some odd reason. 

He suddenly heard a knock on his door which drew his attention in front of him . His mother softly peeked her head through and slowly let herself in, taking a seat on his bed. 

"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you" she said softly. 

Niall shrugged his shoulders and looked up at his mother, telling her that he wasn't really doing anything to begin with. 

She nodded and smoothed the blanket on either side of her legs, wondering how she was going to break the news to her son. 

"Did you see what happened on the news?" 

"If you're talking about the stupid thing I did earlier today, then yes" 

She shook her head, a sad smile formed on her lips. 

"That wasn't stupid, honey, that was very brave of you and I'm so proud of you for making that decision to share your story, but that wasn't what I was referring to" 

She reached her hand out to Niall's who took it without any hesitation. She stared hopefully into his eyes and swallowed the lump in her throat.

"That awful man will be put to death"

Niall furrowed his eyebrows, not believing the words that left his mother's lips. 

"Everyone demanded that there be a reconsideration from the judge and he... rejected the plea deal. I knew he wouldn't allow that man to continue living after all the evil he has done" 

She crouched down to where her son sat on the floor and held his face in her hands while she cried. 

Niall pulled her into an embrace, feeling all sorts of mixed emotions clash inside of him. 

They stayed like this for a long time until his mother excused herself to go prepare dinner while they waited for his father to arrive home from work. 

Niall got up from his place on the floor, cursing his inability to grab his crutches quickly, and carefully hobbled to his closet. His fingers gently grasped the closet door handle and swung it open to reveal a small box that stuck out beneath a pile of clothes. He took it into his hands and slipped on a black hoodie, turning to make his way out the bedroom door towards the kitchen. 

The smell of freshly cooked beef stew invaded his senses as he shakily walked down the stairs putting one crutch in front of the other. His mother only made beef stew on special occasions and ever since he was reunited back with his family, she hadn't bothered to make a different dish knowing very well it was his favorite. 

She glanced over her shoulder and rushed over to Niall, helping him down the staircase. 

"Dinner is almost ready" she said, keeping an arm wrapped around his shoulder. 

She moved back to the stove and mixed the contents of the large pot until the box in Niall's hand piqued her curiosity. He felt his mother's stare on him and nervously fidgeted with the lid of the box, ultimately tucking it inside his hoodie's front pocket. 

"I uh… I have to go do something real quick in the backyard" he chewed on his bottom lip, a nervous habit he had recently developed. 

"Niall, you can barely move. How are you going to-" 

"Please mum! I just need… to do this" he said in exasperation. 

His mother nodded reluctantly, reminding him to bundle up since it was still cold out and to not take long. 

\--------------

The dead grass crunched underneath his shoes as he once again struggled to steady himself on the crutches. The once white painted fence that enclosed his backyard was now deteriorating due to the elements and creaked slightly as he leaned onto it, trying to catch his breath. 

His leg was throbbing in pain, but he pushed the feeling aside as much as he could and hoisted himself over the fence, landing roughly on the opposite side of his yard that ran deeper into the extended woods that surrounded his home. He suppressed a pained scream, afraid that his mother would rush outside to stop him from continuing any further, and shakily got back up. Once he felt he was several feet away, he slowed his pace and carefully sat down on the ground, placing the box in front of him and finally removing the lid. 

His fingers trembled as he picked up the beanie that had once belonged to his captor's dead sister. He hated himself for having kept this simple piece of fabric. He should have thrown it away or just gave it back to the police, but a small part of him wanted to hold on to it.

He traced the white snowflake pattern with his fingertips as his vision blurred with fresh tears. He closed his eyes and tried to remember how life used to be like before all of this happened, before the events that forever changed his life had occurred. 

With a pained expression, he set the fabric on the ground and dug his right hand into his pocket. He fished out a lighter, flicking it on successfully and steadied his trembling hand. He brought the bright flame to the bottom of the soft fabric and slowly watched as it began to burn. 

The orange and red sparks encapsulated the material and slowly ascended upwards, engulfing it as a whole. The warmth from the crackling fire that consumed not only the beanie, but stray twigs and leaves, brought a weird sense of relief to Niall. He felt as though a huge amount of weight was being lifted from his shoulders, and sighed a breath of relief when the object in front of him was now a dismantled mess. 

He wiped his hands on his pants and jumped slightly at the loud crack of thunder coming from the ominous grey sky.

Almost as if on cue, it immediately began to pour.

The sizzle of rain droplets hitting the small growing fire had begun to fill the air and dwindled the small fire down to crisp heaps of burnt leaves. Niall watched, mesmerized at how quickly the water swept everything away. Every emotion, every last piece of ash, just like a clean slate. 

He raised his hood over his wet hair and reached beside him to grab his crutches. In the faint distance he could hear his mother's voice and frowned, realizing he was late for dinner. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading


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